Category: Mental Health

  • 10 Subtle Micromovements That Reveal Anxiety’s Early Indicators in Adults

    10 Subtle Micromovements That Reveal Anxiety’s Early Indicators in Adults

    You’re sitting in the waiting room to go into your first big interview or give the presentation you’ve been working on for weeks. Maybe your foot starts tapping quicker and quicker, or you start twirling your hair. Why is your body doing this, and what can these small movements tell you? 

    Micromovements serve as the body’s way to signal rising anxiety.  

    Learning to recognize early tension triggers can help build emotional resilience and maintain calm through the day.

    When you hone awareness, you can use mindful techniques to respond, which can help you preserve well-being and maintain focus in work and play. Plus, learning to recognize early tension triggers can also help build emotional resilience and maintain calm through the day.

    Here are 10 common signals your body might be sending you. 

    The 10 Subtle Micromovements

    1. The Brow Furrow or Knit

    We often knit our eyebrows together when looking at a computer screen or reading a dense email. While in some cases, this might be due to awkward positioning at your desk or a need to make adjustments to your screen, worry or mental strain can trigger this tiny contraction of the forehead muscles. The brain signals these muscles to tighten as it tries to process a difficult problem, mirroring the internal effort to solve a stressful situation.

    2. Jaw Clenching or Grinding

    Do you ever catch yourself clenching your jaw in a stressful moment, like when you’re driving through heavy traffic or working under a tight deadline? Awake bruxism, another term for grinding, is common, affecting up to 23% of adults. A tense jaw is part of your body’s physical defense system: it’s preparing to stabilize your head and neck in the presence of physical threat.

    3. The Shallow Breath

    During a stressful meeting, you might notice your chest rising and falling rapidly while your stomach remains perfectly still. Internal tension disrupts normal breathing, leading to a shift to rapid, shallow chest breathing. The autonomic nervous system enters a sympathetic response, treating minor mental strain the same way it treats actual physical danger.

    4. Finger Tapping or Cuticle Picking

    When we’re anxious, we might repeatedly taps a desk or pick at the skin around our fingernails during a long pause in conversation. The nervous system drives these small, rhythmic movements when it contains too much restless energy. The motor system generates repetitive actions to help discharge that excess stimulation and restore internal balance.

    It’s common to curl our toes tightly inside our shoes or bounce a heel rapidly against the floor. This lower-body tension shows that stress has traveled down the musculoskeletal system. The body prepares its legs and feet for sudden action, keeping you in a constant state of hyper-vigilance.

    6. Lip Biting or Chewing

    Sometimes we trap our bottom lip between our teeth or chew on the inside of our cheek. The lower lip bite is the classic signal of I’m thinking that over or I’m trying to decide—moments that often come with some anxiety or uncertainty. It might seem strange, but this self-regulating behavior increases physical sensations in the mouth. The nervous system uses this sensory input to distract you from emotional discomfort.

    7. Subtle Neck and Shoulder Tensing

    Here’s one to notice: when a difficult email arrives, see if you shrug your shoulders up toward your ears without realizing it. This posture mimics a protective instinct to guard the neck from a sudden blow. Muscles in the upper back tighten to prepare you for a perceived threat.

    8. Hair Twirling or Touching

    Do you tend to wrap a strand of hair around your finger or stroke your head during a challenging presentation. This form of fidgeting is a pacifying behavior. The gentle, repetitive touch provides comfort to an overstimulated brain, helping to soothe rising internal agitation.

    9. Eyelid Fluttering or Rapid Blinking

    In many situations, people blink rapidly when answering a stressful question. Rapid blinking is an important facial expression that indicates heightened anxiety and fatigue. The accelerated blink rate reflects a sudden spike in adrenaline and stress hormones within the nervous system.

    10. The Freezing Response

    Sometimes a sudden loud noise or receiving unexpected news can cause a lock in posture. We stop moving for a few seconds. This momentary pause represents the primal freeze response. The brain temporarily halts all motor functions to evaluate its surroundings before choosing an action.

    The autonomic nervous system is a network of nerves that regulates involuntary body processes, like heart rate and blood pressure. 

    This system relies on the sympathetic and parasympathetic networks. The sympathetic nervous system drives the “fight or flight” response, accelerating heart rate and muscle readiness during perceived danger. The parasympathetic nervous system manages the “rest and digest” system, lowering heart rate and encouraging recovery when the threat passes.

    You might notice that many of these micromovements are a primal body-response to perceived physical threat—even when no such immediate threat is present. Micromovements are the physical spillover of this intense internal activation; they often serve as unconscious attempts at self-regulation, as the motor system discharges excess nervous energy.

    Micromovements prove that the body actively communicates a specific need—and often, that need is simply rest.

    Anxiety signals a chronically overactive sympathetic nervous system. When this stress response remains active, the adrenal glands flood the bloodstream with stress hormones such as cortisol and adrenaline.

    It’s easy to miss early nervous system warning signs when our attention is fractured. Micromovements prove that the body actively communicates a specific need—and often, that need is simply rest. Recognizing these micromovements is the first step toward altering behavioral responses and proactive stress management.

    Mindfulness as a Solution

    Mindfulness offers a way to keep our awareness in the present moment. This practice trains interoception, which is our ability to  accurately perceive internal bodily signals. 

    One way that mindfulness can help us build better interoception is through practices like the body scan, a structured exercise in which individuals monitor physical sensations from head to toe. As you scan your body, assess how each part feels. This can help determine where an emotional reaction took place and where it sits. For example, you may experience tension in your stomach, and can intentionally breathe into the belly to relax that tension.

    Mindfulness training strengthens structural connectivity within the brain’s interoceptive networks, supporting emotional well-being. Mindful practices put you back in the driver’s seat: when you experience yourself as the observer of your thoughts, you have more say in how you respond. This more objective stance de-escalates the anxiety cycle, rewiring neural pathways to foster better emotional regulation. 

    In addition, focused sensory attention gently steers the mind away from anxious and negative thought loops. It involves focusing on the world around you by using all five senses. This practice establishes a supportive relationship between the mind and body.

    Need Some Practice? Start here. 

    You can build bodily awareness through simple daily routines. 

    • Set a recurring phone reminder for a daily check-in—for example, a 60-second exercise to pause and scan the body for physical indicators of stress. Alternatively, detecting a micromovement could also trigger the mindful pause. This is when you would start doing a body scan.
    • Expand this routine with the 4-7-8 breathing technique to regulate heart rate. This involves breathing through the nose for four seconds, holding the breath for seven seconds and exhaling through pursed lips for eight seconds. A study from the National Institutes of Health shows that structured slow-breathing exercises significantly lower blood pressure and reduce stress responses.
    • A micromovement journal can reveal your personal patterns, and writing about your stress can also help to understand and alleviate emotional hooks. 
    • For deeper exploration, the RAIN method guides you to recognize, allow, investigate and nurture internal sensations. This four-step mindfulness technique helps to process difficult emotions and break reactive habit loops.

    Focusing on just one type of micromovement per week keeps the practice manageable. This supportive practice emphasizes personal compassion over perfection, empowering you to reclaim agency over your daily lives.

    Bring Personal Awareness Into Daily Life

    Anxiety often begins with quiet physical signals. Mindfulness provides the tools to listen to these subtle bodily signs. This clear awareness transforms you from a passive reactor into a conscious, proactive manager of your inner state. Recognizing early bodily shifts allows professionals and practitioners to build greater emotional stability.


    This post comes to us from Lola Marks, Senior Editor at Body+Mind.



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  • Embodied Compassion for Difficult Emotions

    Embodied Compassion for Difficult Emotions

    When you’re overwhelmed and feeling the urge to resist or repress painful, confusing, or distressing emotions, use this meditation from recovery coach Emily Jane to practice staying present with courage and compassion.

    One of the core principles of mindfulness practice that can be a challenge for people is the notion that it actually makes more sense to accept our emotions rather than resist them. Especially when it comes to painful, confusing, or frightening emotions, this move towards ourselves in compassion can feel incredibly counterintuitive. 

    This week, author and recovery coach Emily Jane guides us through a practice you can use anytime you need support bringing curiosity, courage, and compassion to difficult experiences.

    Embodied Compassion for Difficult Emotions

    You can read and practice the guided meditation script below, pausing after each paragraph. Or, listen to the audio practice.

     When we experience difficult emotions, our natural tendency is to repress or resist them, and yet it is often this very resistance that creates even more stress and suffering. In this meditation, we will begin to gently shift our relationship by creating space for our uncomfortable emotions. We will invite them in and sit with them with compassion, like an old friend.

    We will start the meditation with some mindful awareness, then turn towards the emotions, sensations, and parts of ourselves that we might usually avoid or wish we didn’t have to feel. 

    1. Begin by finding a position that feels comfortable, either sitting in a chair, on your bed or the floor, or lying down. When you’re ready, you can close your eyes or lower your gaze. Allow your shoulders to relax down, your jaw to soften, maybe opening and closing the jaw a couple of times, creating a little movement and inviting some release. Let all the little muscles around the eyes, the forehead, the cheeks to soften as best they can. 
    2. Now bring awareness to the surface beneath you. Feel into that support, how it holds you. If your feet are touching the floor, feel into that connection between your feet and the ground, feeling into the support that is already here.
    3. Notice the temperature of your body and of the temperature of the air around you. Notice the weight of your body and the gentle pull of gravity holding you.
    4. Now bring your awareness to the natural rhythm of your breath. Follow the pathway of the breath through the body. Noticing how it enters the body, where the breath lands in the body—perhaps the chest, the belly, the ribs. And notice how it leaves the body. Just take a moment to feel one full breath from beginning to end, and then the next.
    5. Now take a slightly deeper inhale through the nose, allow the breath to flow down into the belly and then exhale with a sigh. And again, breathing in through the nose and exhaling slowly with a sigh.
    6. Now bring awareness to your body as a whole. Notice what it feels like to be you in this moment, in this body. See if you can approach your experience with curiosity and a sense of compassion.
    7. Become aware of any sensations, noting any emotions that are present or areas of tension, discomfort, or heaviness. Whatever is here, see if you can just allow it to be here and just gently make space for it.
    8. Now, become aware of that part of you that is aware. The part of you aware of the breath, the body, the sensations and emotions. See if you can lean into the awareness itself, this observing presence, and notice its qualities. Perhaps there is calm here, a stillness, or a sense of peace and compassion.
    9. Rest for a moment in this compassionate awareness. If it feels supportive, place one hand on your heart. Feel the warmth of your hands, the gentle pressure, just offering the body care and support.
    10. Now bring to mind a difficult emotion, memory, or situation. Nothing too intense, just something you’ve been finding a bit challenging. Perhaps something that’s been worrying you lately, an interaction that’s upset or annoyed you, or just a feeling that you’ve been carrying.
    11. As you bring this to mind, notice what happens in your body. Maybe sensations begin to emerge, restlessness, tightness, heaviness, or a sinking feeling. Maybe you notice an emotion. Just feel into whatever arises and name the emotion. Describe any sensations. 
    12. See if you can simply observe the sensation, just being a compassionate witness to the discomfort or pain and allowing the experience to be here without immediately pushing it away. Remember: you don’t have to pretend it’s all okay, and you don’t have to like it. But see if you can welcome it, making space for it, letting it be exactly as it is. And if this feels challenging, that’s okay. It’s in our human nature to resist discomfort, so if there’s resistance, just notice that too without judgment. 
    13. As you sit with this emotion or sensation, notice that there is space around it. Space inside the body, space around the body. The support beneath you is still there. The breath is still moving, and this emotion, this sensation, is only one part of your experience. It’s a part of you, but it’s not all of you.
    14. Now just move a little closer towards the emotion and gently place your hand over the area where you feel the emotion or sensation most strongly. Through your hand offer these words, “I see you. I’m here with you. I offer you space, compassion, and love.” Notice what happens when you say these words. Maybe this part of you responds to the words. Maybe you experience less resistance towards it. Perhaps there’s a softening or you even find peace in the discomfort or pain. Perhaps nothing changes at all. Whatever happens is okay. There’s no right way to experience this. 
    15. Just spend a few more moments being with this emotion, with this sensation. Then return your awareness to the breath, and as you inhale, imagine breathing compassion into the body. Let it flow into the center of the emotion, and as you exhale, allow it to expand into the space around you. Breathing in compassion, breathing out compassion. And as you breathe, allow this emotion to integrate into the fullness of your being. 
    16. Now begin to sense the body as a whole. The support beneath you, the ground holding you, feeling the support of gravity. Remind yourself gently with these words, “I can be with difficult emotions when I create a compassionate space for them.”
    17. Now gently bring your awareness back to the space around you. Notice any sounds in the room, the temperature of the air. Invite some gentle movement into the body. Maybe a gentle sway or gently just shaking the arms. Take one final deep breath into the belly and exhale fully. When you’re ready, you can open your eyes, returning in your own time.



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  • A 12 Minute Meditation to Make Movement Mindful with Cara Bradley

    A 12 Minute Meditation to Make Movement Mindful with Cara Bradley

    Our bodies come in all varieties, and we all have different interests, skill, and abilities. But as today’s teacher Cara Bradley observes, movement of any kind—from the slightest glance to the most intense exercise—can be mindful.

    This simple meditation helps you celebrate your physicality with practices to connect with your breath and your body, expand your awareness, and appreciate the gift of being alive.

    A Meditation to Make Movement Mindful

    Read and practice the guided meditation script below, pausing after each paragraph. Or listen to the audio practice.

    1. The intention behind this practice today is to stabilize our bodies and minds, to synchronize our breath and movement, and to energize all over physical, emotional, and mental well-being. What’s important to remember from this all is that when our bodies are calm, our minds get calm. And when our bodies feel stable and steady, our minds feel stable and steady. What’s happening physically also reflects mentally. In fact, in many ways, our nervous system is a reflection of what’s happened in our mind. So if you’re feeling really crazy-busy, I’m going to encourage you to look at your nervous system first with some of the tools that I’m going to teach you here in this meditation. 
    2. We are going to be moving and breathing in rhythm. This helps us to facilitate what’s called coherence. Coherence is a way of harmonizing our nervous system, our heart rate, our brain waves. Research shows that when we’re in coherence or in a coherent state, we feel better. We feel calmer, more clear. We feel more energized. And our minds are more quiet. The best way to find coherence is by finding your breath and breathing in rhythm. 
    3. Don’t worry about perfect, it doesn’t exist. Don’t worry about big or small or advanced or beginner, it’s not about that at all. This is a mindful movement practice, so this is your practice to cultivate awareness of both mind and body. We’ll be moving for maybe six to seven minutes, real simple movements that everybody can do, and then we’ll be taking rest. Now I encourage you to give yourself the time to take a minute or two rest. It’s when we start to integrate. It’s where we integrate and really allow ourselves the opportunity to experience ourselves in that coherence. In a more settled and stable state of being. You’re worth it and your life is worth it. 
    4. Place your feet hip-width distance, get a comfortable stance, and here we go. Let’s just find that rhythm. Inhale, reach your arms forward and up. Spin your palms open, exhale arms out and down. Inhale, reach forward and up. Spin palms open, exhale out and down. One more time. Inhale, reach forward and up. Spin palms, exhale out and down. 
    5. Next is what I call Sinking Body and Mind. Exhale, reach over to your left. Inhale, rise back up to center. Exhale, sway to your right. Inhale, reach up. So we’re moving slowly on purpose, everyone. Exhale, reach left. Inhale, reach up. Exhale, reach to the right. One more time, inhale up. Exhale, laugh. Inhale up. Exhale right. Inhale, reach back up. Exhale to your left, we’re going to hold, bring your hand to your hip. Breathe in, reach, exhale. So just following breath, inhale nice and deep. Reach, exhale, press your hips to the right, breathe in. Breathe out. Just one more, inhale. 
    6. If you can, reach a little further. Inhale, reach both arms up. Exhale, sway to your right. Inhale. Exhale, reach. Just stay on breath. Inhale. Exhale, reach. Great side stretch here, inhale. Exhale, last one, inhale, exhale, reach, hold, inhale, reach both arms up. 
    7. Now, place your hands on your knees like you’re a baseball player. With straight arms, pull your bum back, now reach your arms back. On your inhale, reach arms forward, up, look up, exhale arms back and down, inhale reach up, give them a swing, exhale back. Inhale, reach up, exhale back. One more time. Inhale, reached up. Exhale back. Reach your arms all the way up, this time interlock your fingers behind your head. Send your hips forward and just lay your head back for a moment here. 
    8. Now, root through your feet and send your hips forward. Can you really let your head go on your hands? What does that feel like? Open your elbows up just a little wider, one more breath, inhale, big stretch your lungs. Exhale, reach both arms up overhead. One more time, hands to your knees like a baseball player. This time drop your elbows to your knees if you can. If you have some low back stuff, stay right here. Otherwise you can drop elbows right here and look down, nice forward flexion. 
    9. Let’s take three breaths here. Inhale, pull your hips back, exhale. Again, finding breath. Inhale, hips back. Exhale. One more time, breathe in, sink your hips a little lower. Little dynamic movement, inhale, straighten legs. Exhale, bend your knees. So they don’t have to straighten completely. Inhale, straighten, matching movement and breath. Exhale, bent. Three more, inhale. Go find that breath, that’s the coherent breath. Exhale, nice and deep and rhythmic. Inhale. Exhale. This is it. Last one. Inhale. Exhale, bend deep and hold. 
    10. While we’re here, let’s take it to the floor. Come all the way down onto your belly. Dynamic backbend, so reach your arms out to the side legs together. On your inhale, lift up. Exhale, lower halfway. Inhale, lift, up. Exhale, low. So this is so healthy for our spines, everyone. Inhale, and lift up, Exhale, lower. Last one. Inhale, lift up, hold. Hold, reach. Reach through your fingers. Lift your chest, lift your legs, and release down. 
    11. We’ll take it onto our backs to finish up. So roll onto your back, straighten both legs out, and again, working dynamically. Pull your right knee in, give yourself a good hug here, good squeeze. Really helpful for your hips. Now breathe in, breathe out, switch your legs, left knee in, inhale. Exhale, switch your legs, inhale. Exhale. One more time, switch, inhale, squeeze, exhale. Bring both knees in, just give yourself a squeeze, and I’ll bring your knees to 90 degrees. Take your arms out to the side. 
    12. Take our final spinal twist here, our final movement. On your inhale, lower knees to your right. Look to your left. Exhale, lift to center. So they don’t need to touch. Inhale to your lift, good twist for your spine. Exhale, center. Following breath and movement, inhale, right. Exhale, center, inhale, left. Exhale, center. One more time. Inhale, right. Exhale center, inhale left. Exhale center. Now place your feet to the floor, straighten your legs, separate your feet everybody, spin your palms up so you’re like a snow angel, big and wide, and just close your eyes here and allow yourself these next few minutes to really connect into your body. 
    13. As you lay here in stillness, notice any sensations, any sense of coolness or heat. Maybe something’s tingling. Our body speaks to us through the language of sensation. And by connecting body and mind through breath and movement, our awareness is heightened. 
    14. We start to become more fluent in that language of sensations. So what are you feeling in your body? And finally, notice your breath. Just notice how your body is breathing, what it feels like to be inhaling, what changes in your ribs, around your back, and what happens when you exhale. Just noting, using your body, your breath, your pulsing, your sensations as anchors for your awareness in this mindfulness practice. 
    15. Now just open your eyes and notice what it feels like to be you right now in this moment. Do you feel more clear and calm? Or stable, or at ease. Maybe you feel more energized and ready for your day. Pull your knees to your chest and just roll over to one side. And roll on up, have a seat for one more moment. With your chin up and your gaze up. Thank yourself for making it through this practice. Thank yourself for giving yourself this gift of movement, of deep, coherent breathing, and of some stillness and silence.



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  • A Different Kind of Father’s Day: Nurturing Mindfulness and Care in the Garden

    A Different Kind of Father’s Day: Nurturing Mindfulness and Care in the Garden

    On Mother’s day, I found myself at my local garden center, where I like to spend the holiday. In fact, my only request each Mother’s Day is to spend some time picking out plants and then finding a home for them in my garden. On this particular Sunday, I overheard another mom talking with her children, beaming as she told them how the garden was her “happy place.” Her delight was contagious, and the children skipped off, eagerly pointing out their favorite blooms, asking if they too could take a plant home. 

    There are many ways that gardening mirrors care work.

    Variations of this scene played out all around me, moms both wanting to and getting to spend the holiday here amongst the teeming plant life. I wondered if the store would look the same in just a few weeks, when Father’s Day rolled around. I hoped that it would.

    Benefits of Gardening 

    There are many ways that gardening mirrors care work. Anyone who has spent an afternoon weeding knows that it can be a thankless task, and that nurturing a seed as it grows into its fullest expression requires patience, consistency, resilience, hope, and a bit of luck. 

    In nature, as in parenthood, awe and beauty proliferate in the process, rather than at any predetermined end point.

    There is an adage among parents that parenting often involves more of the joy-fun than the fun-fun, meaning it can be deeply rewarding and fulfilling, but doesn’t always provide immediate gratification. This is of course true in the garden, too. A fig tree seedling doesn’t immediately bear fruit. An asparagus plant requires three years to root and mature before it is ready for harvest. 

    In nature, as in parenthood, awe and beauty proliferate in the process, rather than at any predetermined end point. Practices that cultivate experiences of awe and an appreciation of beauty positively impact wellbeing. If you ask someone about their most recent experience of awe (which I suggest you do!), they might share a moment in nature: a shooting star in the otherwise inky black sky, the appearance of a rainbow shimmering overhead on an anniversary of a loved one’s passing, the discovery of a robin’s perfectly pale blue eggs. Or, chances are, they will share a moment with a child: a first step, a dimpled smile, a birth. Like any mental muscle, we can train ourselves to look for these moments. Often, all we have to do is step outside. 

    Gardening is an investment in something that needs nurturing. It requires taking seriously the commitment to care for a living thing.

    Studies have shown that gardening has a positive impact on health and wellbeing. Simply spending time in green spaces can measurably reduce stress levels. Time in nature gives our brain an opportunity to engage in what’s called “soft fascination,” a diffuse attentional state in which the brain, freed of an immediate task-demand, can experience relaxation, make new connections, and restore attention. Most of us have had the experience of going on a walk and suddenly coming up with a solution to a previously unsolvable problem or – less dramatically but equally important – returning to our desk feeling refreshed and in a better mood. Parenting is demanding of many resources, not the least of which is attention. As parental stress and the demands of modern parenting increase, it is more and more pressing to identify both sustainable and accessible practices of stress management. Gardens can offer a built-in salve. 

    Further, while gardening can be a quiet, restorative, individual activity, gardening communities abound in the form of CSAs, urban gardens, plant shares, and seed libraries, suggesting that gardening can also feed the social brain. Leisure activities that foster social connection have a particular impact on happiness (the fun-fun!). And, in parenting, having a strong social network is a protective factor for overall health

    There’s something else that differentiates gardening from other activities in nature, though. 

    In fact, fathers who act as primary caregivers experience many of the physiological brain changes previously associated with biological mothers, such as changes in grey matter and restructuring of emotional processing centers of the brain.

    Gardening is an investment in something that needs nurturing. It requires taking seriously the commitment to care for a living thing. It is what gardening represents—about who wants to, gets to, and needs to care for our environment and our fellow human beings, about who enjoys cultivating beauty, about who has the capacity to be patient, gentle, and tender—that makes it a particularly poignant activity for fathers. 

    Dads as Essential Caregivers

    There has been a historic gap in research on fathers’ experiences of parenthood. In her book, Dad Brain, Darcy Saxbe explains how new studies at the intersection of neuroscience and psychology reveal how all of us—not just moms—are predisposed for caretaking. This shows up in the form of neural circuitry that is activated by the act of caretaking, not simply, or even solely reliant upon, experiences of pregnancy and birth. 

    In fact, fathers who act as primary caregivers experience many of the physiological brain changes previously associated with biological mothers, such as changes in grey matter and restructuring of emotional processing centers of the brain. 

    Fathers have much to gain from their role as caregivers. The majority of fathers report deriving significant meaning and feelings of purpose from parenthood. Interestingly—and maybe unsurprisingly—dads who act as primary caregivers also seem to be more vulnerable to the mental health challenges associated with modern parenthood. They, like all parents, need support and access to tools and practices that promote wellbeing. Gardening, with its overall benefit to wellbeing, quality of life, and health, is one such example. In order to meaningfully encourage this we must first acknowledge—and even better, celebrate—fathers’ capacity to nurture, shepherd, and cultivate.

    When we take a father’s role as a caregiver seriously, we not only bolster support systems for children, we also more effectively honor the challenges and benefits of carework in general. 

    Father’s Day is only one day of the year. But holidays reinforce cultural norms and values. Father’s Day traditions can provide a mirror for cultural messaging about a father’s role, needs, and desires, as well as the activities and resources available to them. If we pause to really consider the values we’d like to cultivate as parents, perhaps we might see how an activity like gardening can offer fathers the associated psychological and health benefits, while also reinforcing their essential role within complex networks of care. 

    To be clear, there is no one right or wrong way to celebrate Father’s Day. In fact, there are infinite ways to have a meaningful celebration. Regardless of how we choose to spend the day itself, when we take a father’s role as a caregiver seriously, we not only bolster support systems for children, we also more effectively honor the challenges and benefits of carework in general. 

    And, perhaps by more intentionally including fathers in some of the rituals, communities, and activities that have historically been associated with moms—by inviting them into the garden, so to speak—we can also extend our understanding of who desires, deserves, and has a duty to care for living things. 

    Mindful Gardening Practices For Fathers And Families 

    1. Plant a seed with your child. A single seed is all you need. Plant it outside or on a window sill. Together, check on it daily. Each time you do, share your observations about the teeny, tiny changes you notice as it begins to sprout and grow. 
    2. Go for a senses walk in a garden. Look for all of the colors of the rainbow. Smell the flowers and gently rub edible herbs between your fingers, noticing the fragrance that lingers. Feel the sun, wind, or mist on your face. If there is a clean fruit or vegetable ready for harvesting, do a taste test together, savoring the flavors.
    3. Visit a garden center, join a CSA, volunteer with an urban gardening project, or visit a seed library. These are great activities to do as a family. Introduce yourselves. See what new facts you can discover about native flora, companion planting, dahlia tubers, even cucumber trellises.
    4. Find a sit-spot. Dedicate one place—a window, a tree, a bench—that you can return to weekly. Each time you do, set a timer for 3 minutes (or 30 seconds, if doing this with a small child). Sit silently, noticing the sights, sounds, smells, and your own emotions. Share, draw, or journal your observations.
    5. Invite a father-figure. Consider bringing a fellow father, partner, or a father-figure to a garden experience with you. Share what you love about the garden. Show them where you find beauty, meaning, and awe. While you’re at it, share what you appreciate about them as a caregiver, how they themselves have been a cultivator of growth. 



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  • Free Meditation Apps Worthy of Your Attention

    Free Meditation Apps Worthy of Your Attention

    There’s no shortage of mindfulness and meditation apps these days, promising to help you combat anxiety, sleep better, hone your focus, and more. In fact, the Wall Street Journal reports that more than 2,000 new meditation apps launched between 2015 and 2018, and offerings have only increased as a result of higher demand during the pandemic—according to the New York Times, mindfulness apps surged in 2020. We took the overwhelm out of finding the most valuable and easy-to-use meditation apps that are available free and narrowed it down to these five apps.

    Summary

    Mindfulness.com

    • Platforms: iOS, Android, web
    • Highlights: Over 2,000 guided meditations with a customizable “For You” experience, quick mini exercises,sleep aids, and calming soundscapes.
    • Paid Upgrade: Offers Mindfulness Plus+ for enhanced features like daily coaching.

    Insight Timer

    • Platforms: iOS, Android, web
    • Highlights: Massive library of 80,000+ free meditations from 10,000+ teachers, live events, and a global community showing real-time meditation stats.
    • Paid Upgrade: Annual subscription unlocks courses, offline downloads, and advanced player controls.

    Smiling Mind

    • Platforms: iOS, Android, web
    • Highlights: Not-for-profit with structured programs for different age groups and needs, including quick sessions and family-friendly content.
    • Cost: Entirely free with no premium options.

    UCLA Mindful

    • Platforms: iOS, Android
    • Highlights: Developed by UCLA’s Mindful Awareness Research Center, featuring bilingual guided meditations and research-based practices, plus longer “podcast” sessions.
    • Cost: Free.

    Healthy Minds Program

    • Platforms: iOS, Android
    • Highlights: Merges neuroscience with meditation training using a four-pillar approach (Awareness, Connection, Insight, Purpose) and offers micro practices for on-the-go mindfulness.
    • Cost: Free.

    5 Free Meditation Apps We’re Happy We Downloaded

    1) Mindfulness.com

    Available for iOS, Android, and web

    Entry price: Free

    With over 2,000 guided meditations from world-leading teachers, this app caters to both beginners and seasoned practitioners.

    The interface includes five tabs: Mini, where you can find quick and easy mindfulness exercises you can do anytime throughout the day; Meditate, where you’ll find all of the app’s 2,000+ guided meditations; Sleep, which houses restful and relaxing meditations for deep sleep; Radio, where you can find mindfulness music and sound scapes for focus and calm; and finally the For You tab, which is really what makes this app stand out.

    Throughout your use of this app, you’ll be prompted to provide information about your preferences, goals, and the type of support you’re looking for. The app will then offer personalized daily coaching videos paired with guided meditations on the For You tab. You can choose what length you’d like your daily meditations to be—from five to 30 minutes—depending on your schedule and level of practice. Opportunities to dive deeper include meditation courses, expert Q&As, breath work, journaling prompts, and more.

    Whether you’re looking to reduce stress and anxiety or seeking support for overall mental health, the Mindfulness.com app is a solid resource. The multitude of functionalities offered by this app puts your mindfulness journey in your hands and enables you to grow in the direction of your choosing at your own pace.

    Paid option: For $84.99 per year (with a 14-day free trial) or $169 for a lifetime membership, both with a 30-Day money-back guarantee, Mindfulness Plus+ includes: daily mindfulness video coaching and meditations; courses and tools to help manage anxiety, sleep, and stress; over 2,000 meditations, calm music, nature soundscapes, and more.

    Insight Timer - Free Meditation Apps

    Available for iOS, Android, and web

    Entry price: Free

    Insight Timer has a huge library of content: over 80,000 free guided meditations from over 10,000 teachers on topics like stress, relationships, healing, sleep, creativity, and more.

    Right from the beginning, the app feels like a global community—the world map on the home screen shows a collective of 18 million meditators, and announces, “741k today, 7k now.” After you finish a meditation, you’ll learn exactly how many people were meditating “with you” during that time—and by setting your location, you can even see meditators nearby and what tracks they’re listening to.

    Once you find a teacher you enjoy—like Jack Kornfield, Tara Brach, Sharon Salzberg, or Rhonda Magee—you can follow them to make sure you don’t miss any new content. You can also tune in to free talks for life advice and inspiration. For those craving real-time interactions, Insight Timer offers live events every hour of the day to join on a whim or plan into your schedule. 

    You can even sign up to Circle for Teams, one of their newer offerings, which allows you to create circles (read: groups) to meditate in real-time with friends or colleagues.

    If you prefer a quieter meditation, however, you can simply set a timer and meditate to intermittent bells, calming ambient noise, or soothing music.

    Depending on your preferences, Insight Timer’s extensive collection can be either a blessing or a curse—an endless list of choices that leave you overwhelmed or a buffet of tempting options to sink your teeth into.

    Paid option: For $60 per year (with a 30-day free trial), you get access to courses with well-known teachers, the ability to download meditations and listen offline, and advanced player functions like repeat mode and fast forward and rewind.

    3) Smiling Mind

    Free Meditation Apps - Smiling Mind app screenshot

    Available for iOS, Android, and web

    Entry price: Free

    Smiling Mind hits the sweet spot for a free mindfulness app in so many ways. 

    The not-for-profit app features hundreds of meditations, enough to keep you engaged without overwhelming you with choice. They are organized into structured programs like Mindful Foundations (35 sessions), Sleep (6 sessions), Digital Detox (8 sessions), and Stress Management (10 sessions), but you have the flexibility to choose where to start and to easily jump between programs. Most meditations are in the five- to fifteen-minute range, with a few practices up to 45 minutes for advanced meditators. Smiling Mind also offers bite-sized meditations between 2 to 5 minutes for moments when you’re in need of a quick, mindful pause in the day.

    Downloaded by over 5.5 million people, the app also has a variety of specialized programs for families, children and teens of various ages, healthcare workers, and educators (including curricula they can use in the classroom); all developed with the help of psychologists and health professionals.

    While you could use a meditation app as a temporary break from your hectic life, Smiling Mind wants you to take your mindfulness practice off the cushion and into the rest of your day. Interspersed with some of the meditation programs are instructions for “activities” like Journaling Exercise, Go Offline, Where Did My Food Come From, and Count Your Senses. In the Count Your Senses activity, for example, the audio prompts you to bring your attention to your senses by counting things that can be seen, felt, heard, smelled and tasted. 

    Smiling Mind was originally created for kids, so they offer a robust selection of kid- and youth-appropriate mindfulness sessions. 

    Created by a nonprofit by the same name, Smiling Mind is entirely free—so you don’t have the distraction of paid content that’s inaccessible to you as a free user. The app wants to put a “smile on your mind”—and it might just succeed. 

    Paid option: None

    4) UCLA Mindful

    Free Meditation App—UCLA Mindful

    Available for iOS and Android

    Entry price: Free

    If all the research on mindfulness has persuaded you that you need to meditate, the UCLA Mindful app could be a good place to start. 

    Developed by the Mindful Awareness Research Center at the University of California, Los Angeles (UCLA), the app features about a dozen meditations of different types in English and Spanish. You can learn to focus on your breath, your body, or sounds; work with difficult emotions; and cultivate loving-kindness in sessions ranging from 3 to 19 minutes long.

    If you’re new to mindfulness, you might choose to take advantage of their Getting Started section, which offers information on what mindfulness is, how to choose a meditation, which posture is best for your practice, and what research-backed benefits you might expect from it.

    As a bonus, the app also offers longer meditations that it calls “podcasts.” These are half-hour audio recordings of meditations that include talks, typically by UCLA Director of Mindfulness Education Diana Winston, before and after the meditation, as well as plenty of silent practice time. 

    If you’re looking for an app that is heavily grounded in the science of mindfulness, you can put your trust in UCLA Mindful.

    Paid option: None

    5) Healthy Minds Program

    Available for iOS and Android

    Entry price: Free

    Healthy Minds Program Free Mindfulness App

    The Healthy Minds Program app wants to help you develop the skills for a healthy mind—by strengthening mental focus, decreasing stress, and growing resilience, compassion, and better immune health.

    Founded by neuroscientist Dr. Richard Davidson (who also founded the research institute Center for Healthy Minds at the University of Wisconsin-Madison), the app integrates neuroscience and research-based techniques with meditation training to increase overall well-being.

    The framework of the app’s mindfulness and well-being training is organized into four pillars: Awareness, Connection, Insight, and Purpose. Each pillar consists of three to five parts, and each part contains three series and multiple sessions within. For the Connection pillar, for example, the Innate Self-Worth series includes five sessions packaged to foster self-worth (think sessions like Practice Seeing the Good In Ourselves, and Learn Negativity Bias). You have a choice of either a Sitting or Active type of practice—“active” practices include guidance for being mindful while you exercise, or during your commute—and you can customize the length of time (five minutes to 30 minutes).

    The app offers a collection of 27 meditations outside their four-pillar wellness framework, including one-minute Micro Practices for when you’re in need of a brief respite. 

    At times the podcast-style app may encourage more thinking compared to typical guided meditations, but for the listener who is seeking guided meditations with the greater goal to increase awareness, cognition, and well-being, Healthy Minds Program app may be just the ticket.

    Paid option: None 



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  • Exciting News from Mindful: Please Welcome Our New CEO, Joseph Russell

    Exciting News from Mindful: Please Welcome Our New CEO, Joseph Russell

    In 2020, tech entrepreneur Matt Dickinson launched Mindfulness.com with teacher Melli O’Brien. Together, they envisioned an accessible, practical resource that could empower people to realize their fullest potential through the transformative power of mindfulness. 

    For six years, the Mindfulness app and website have been a global hub where beginners, experienced practitioners, and everyone in between can access thousands of practices, meditations, talks, courses, playlists, nature soundscapes, and more.  

    In 2023, we here at Mindful.org joined up with Mindfulness. As our community knows, we’ve got 15 years of evidence-based editorial content that reaches millions of readers globally with more than 4,000 articles, the 12 Minute Meditation podcast, expert-led courses, an annual print magazine, and a new app. We’ve been the definitive English-language resource for practitioners, clinicians, educators, and researchers since 2009.

    We recognize that we’re shepherding a legacy that’s thousands of years old, using the latest tech tools—and we take both the responsibility and the opportunity seriously. 

    Together, Mindfulness x Mindful brings what few other organizations bring: the very latest in technological developments combined with grounded, human-centered, science-backed mindfulness resources. Our apps are cutting-edge and aim to make accessing mindfulness training seamless, fast, beautiful, and personalized. We also hold the conviction that real human connection is the heart of mindfulness practice in the first place—so we partner with globally-respected writers, teachers, researchers, and thought leaders to bring you articles, guided meditations, talks, courses, and events that are alive with human compassion, wisdom, and creativity.  

    We recognize that we’re shepherding a legacy that’s thousands of years old, using the latest tech tools—and we take both the responsibility and the opportunity seriously. 

    A New Chapter

    On May 25, 2026, we welcomed Joseph Russell as our new Chief Executive Officer.

    Russell brings over 15 years of experience building, scaling, and leading digital products and mobile technology businesses. As co-founder and CEO of DreamWalk, one of Australia’s most recognised app development companies, he helped hundreds of brands and businesses—from Coca-Cola to The Secret—design and launch successful digital experiences. Throughout his tenure, DreamWalk produced dozens of chart-topping mobile applications before it was acquired by multinational advertising group Wellcom in 2012. Russell then re-acquired the brand and relaunched under his leadership in 2017.

    Russell has been featured by The Today Show, The Project, The Australian, Lifehacker, and Executive Style, and has written extensively on digital product strategy for Smart Company, B&T Weekly, and Inside Small Business. He has also served as a mentor and advisor to social impact startups through ygap.

    “We’re living through a period of extraordinary uncertainty. The research on what mindfulness does for human resilience—our capacity to respond rather than react—has never been more relevant.” — Joe Russell, new CEO of Mindfulness United

    As our new CEO, he’s joining Mindfulness United at a pivotal moment for both the company and the broader mindfulness industry. 

    Russell was candid about why the timing feels meaningful: “We’re living through a period of extraordinary uncertainty. The research on what mindfulness does for human resilience—our capacity to respond rather than react—has never been more relevant.”

    Russell added: “Mindful.org has spent 15 years earning the trust of readers, researchers, and practitioners. When you combine that with an app guided by teachers who helped build the clinical science of mindfulness—that’s something genuinely rare. My job is to bring those two things together and do justice to the groundbreaking products and legacy this team has built.”

    Matt Dickinson has faithfully led the work of MU for six years, and we are grateful for his vision and dedication. Reflecting on this transition and why he chose Joe to carry on the work of MU as our new CEO, he said, “Joe brings exactly the combination of skills this company needs at this moment—deep expertise in mobile product and digital growth, a genuine understanding of what it takes to engage an audience, and a personal connection to the mission. We are thrilled to welcome him to the team and excited to see what he builds.”

    Joe also recognizes that joining Mindfulness United is a rare opportunity to create genuine, lasting change for millions of people who are hungry for more clarity, calm, wisdom, and connection in a world that often feels fragmented and frantic. 

    “Mindfulness isn’t a wellness trend,” he says. “These practices have been around for thousands of years. The science is real, the teachers are world-class, and the need has never been greater.” 

    He says his job is to make sure this platform reaches everyone who needs it. 

    As the leaders, organizers, developers, designers, creators, and editors that make up the Mindfulness x Mindful team, we’re on board with that, and we can’t wait to see what’s next.



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  • Addiction, Recovery, and How Mindfulness Can Support Emotional Sobriety

    Addiction, Recovery, and How Mindfulness Can Support Emotional Sobriety

    As someone who has been sober for 26 years, and in my work as a recovery coach, I’ve come to understand there is more to recovery and wellness than being substance- free. While it may begin there, what is equally, if not more important, is our emotional sobriety.

    When I first heard the term emotional sobriety, it sounded like an unattainable, distant experience reserved for Buddhist monks. Heroines of mine like Tara Brach and Pema Chödrön seemed like they might have it nailed, but it felt well out of reach for someone like me. It wasn’t until I went through a particularly emotionally challenging time —one that ultimately became a portal—that I truly came to understand its significance and have since been able to share this important facet of recovery with my clients.

    When I first heard the term emotional sobriety, it sounded like an unattainable, distant experience reserved for Buddhist monks.

    One day my son announced he was moving from New York City to Los Angeles. On the surface his decision seemed exciting and full of promise, but he didn’t have a job or a place to live; he was going to figure it out once he got there. The ongoing uncertainty around his well-being pitched me over the edge. I was an anxious, nervous wreck. For weeks, I checked my phone to see if he had texted me, and scrolled through Instagram and Facebook, furtively scanning for little snippets of his life, trying to confirm if he was okay.

    His life had been my favorite TV show, and I couldn’t get my fix. I couldn’t stop thinking about him, couldn’t stop worrying, and I felt emotionally hijacked.

    Noticing When Your Past Shows Up In Your Present

    As the saying goes: When it’s hysterical, it’s historical. When I took a deeper dive in therapy, I began to understand why his departure had hit me so hard. It mirrored something much older. When I was in college, my mother abruptly moved to Switzerland. No long goodbye, no gradual adjustment — she was simply gone. Decades later, my nervous system didn’t know the difference between then and now.

    My body was grieving an old loss through a new one. I knew enough to attend Al-Anon meetings to try to unhook emotionally, but my peace of mind remained elusive.

    My body was grieving an old loss through a new one. I knew enough to attend Al-Anon meetings to try to unhook emotionally, but my peace of mind remained elusive.

    The shift came when I learned to meditate. As a novice, I was first encouraged to turn my attention to my breath, and to notice the moment, the pause, between my in-breath and my out-breath.

    As I practiced that awareness, an insight bubbled to the surface. My breath, the singular most subtle physical experience, was my life force. This quiet activity that happened without my making it happen—it was the defining characteristic between life and death. I felt a reverence for my breath that I had never had before. Slowly but surely, I developed the ability to observe how my mind, like a cricket, jumped from thought to worry to thought—and eventually, it began to settle.

    For many, substances helped to numb their feelings and had been a type of escape hatch. So when we put substances down, and come into a more intimate relationship with ourselves, being still and quieting our minds might not feel safe. We no longer have something to shut off the noise or dampen the fears.

    Over time, I felt at peace—I felt emotionally sober. I wasn’t scrambling for something outside of myself to ease my discomfort.

    Making the Mind a Quieter Place

    In my work with people who struggle with substance use disorders and/or eating disorders, many clients share with me that they continue to struggle with quieting their minds. For many, substances helped to numb their feelings and had been a type of escape hatch.

    So when we put substances down, and come into a more intimate relationship with ourselves, being still and quieting our minds might not feel safe. We no longer have something to shut off the noise or dampen the fears.

    In my coaching sessions, we discuss the concept of emotional sobriety, and I offer a variety of entry points, like: 

    • Breath work or a body scan
    • The “notice and name” technique
    • Practicing recruiting a sense of stability from the room and immediate surroundings
    • A short, guided meditation
    • Journaling for twenty minutes

    In all these small practices, I am gently guiding them to reconnect with themselves through curiosity rather than judgment. Given there is no single path to stillness, we find one that fits, and we go at the client’s pace.

    Being emotionally un-sober can look like checking out, endless distraction, mindless scrolling. Mindfulness practices help us, over time, to understand that we can be with our uncomfortable emotions without lurching for that escape hatch.

    What I’ve come to understand is that insight and self-awareness are essential, but even with the best intentions we can still get emotionally hijacked, triggered in an instant—and suddenly the urge to escape those uncomfortable feelings feels overwhelming.

    And while we might not reach for the substance or the activity that brought us to recovery in the first place—which is in itself, of course, a marvelous accomplishment—we might reach for other, perhaps more innocuous activities that serve a similar purpose. Being emotionally un-sober can look like checking out, endless distraction, mindless scrolling. Mindfulness practices help us, over time, to understand that we can be with our uncomfortable emotions without lurching for that escape hatch.

    What mindfulness and meditation offer, and what my clients tell me again and again, is a way to reset the emotional thermostat, regardless of what’s happening around them.

    A pause between the in-breath and the out-breath. A moment of choice where there used to be none.

    That is emotional sobriety.


    Stephanie Hazard is a certified peer recovery specialist (CPRS) as well as a certified Carolyn Costin Institute eating disorder recovery coach (CCIEDC). Her debut book, Making Sobriety Stick: A Recovery Coach’s Guide to Sustainable Change, will be released September 22nd during National Recovery Month, and can be pre-ordered at www.pathtowardrecovery.com.



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  • A Meditation on the Art of Stopping (Extended)

    A Meditation on the Art of Stopping (Extended)

    In this practice, teacher Shalini Bahl reminds us that in its simplest form, mindfulness is just about stopping—stopping to notice, to breathe, to gently interrupt our engrained habits of thought with our quiet presence.

    We often think of mindfulness and meditation as a drawn-out, sustained exercise—when in reality, they’re just a collection of micro-moments of stopping, breathing, really noticing our own bodies and our own lives, getting distracted, and then coming back again. Over and over.

    As this week’s teacher Shalini Bahl puts it, today’s guided practice is about the art of stopping: letting go of our regular habits of the mind—the pushing, pulling, running in circles— and instead just being for a moment.

    This is an extended practice, but as a bonus, we’re also sharing a micro-practice version below that you can take into busy days.

    And don’t miss Shalini’s article on Mindful.org that’s all about the power of micro-practices to affect our daily choices.

    A Meditation on the Art of Stopping

    Read and practice the guided meditation script below, pausing after each paragraph. Or listen to the audio practice.

    1. Start by coming to a comfortable posture where you feel supported. If you need more cushions or something to support your back so you feel the elongation along the back of your spine and rolling your shoulders up, back, and down. Rest your hands facing palms up or palms down. When you feel ready, lower or close your eyes.
    2. Receive the sound of the bells as an invitation to the mind to be fully present. To this body, to this breath. Notice the fact that you’re breathing. There’s no need to change your breath in any way. If it’s shallow, let it be shallow, if it’s deep, let it be deep. Just rest your awareness in this breath, entering your body, following it as far as it wants to go. Notice the slight pause when the in-breath changes to out-breath. Then rest in the awareness of that exhale until the out-breath fully leaves your body. And then the pause, resting in that pause before the breath enters the body. 
    3. Follow this cycle of breathing at your own pace, resting in awareness. You’re not thinking about your breath, you’re really starting to sense the breath, the coolness, the touch of the breath as soon as it enters your nostrils. Feel it move in your body, the expansion, as you breathe in, in your lungs, in your chest, in the belly, wherever you feel it. As you inhale, breathe in and then exhale, really sensing that contraction, the letting go. 
    4. Every time your mind wanders, which it will, just notice that with kindness. Let go of that thought for now, knowing you can always return to the plans, to your thoughts, after the practice. For now, just let go of those thoughts and return back to this awareness of the breath. 
    5. Just for these few moments, let go of any rushing, of any judging, of expectations. Allow yourself to breathe just the way you are, as you are. Give your full care and attention to every inhale. To every exhale. And the spaces in between. 
    6. When you’re ready, find one place in your body where you can really feel the direct sensations of breathing. It could be the touch of the breath in the nostrils or the upper lip region where you feel the coolness of the new breath entering the nose, the tingling in your nostrils, or the warmth as you exhale, touching your upper lip. 
    7. If it feels more natural for you, you can turn your attention to feel your breath in the region of your chest or your belly. Find that one place where you can feel the direct experience of breathing. For the next few minutes, stay there with the direct sensations of breathing. Again, keep it effortless, just a very gentle resting in that awareness of the breath. 
    8. If it feels dull, you can open your eyes a little bit. Make your inhale more conscious. If your mind is really active, give more attention to the exhale, the slowing down of your exhale. 
    9. What we are practicing here is the art of stopping and letting go—letting go of our distractions, of our regular habits of the mind, of pushing, pulling, running in circles. We’re just being here, fully present to your breath, allowing yourself to feel your breath directly. 
    10. Notice your expectations of what’s next, of how things should be, even how this practice should be. Notice how your attachments can get in the way of your experience of inner calm in this moment. Soften the grip of those attachments and just return to your direct experience of the breath. Just this one breath. 
    11. Now, expand your awareness of this breath, of the feeling of this breathing in your whole body. You can stay either focused on that one place or you can expand the awareness of this breath moving through your body. Feel your whole body breathing in, breathing out. Notice those micro-moments of letting go of distractions and staying present. 
    12. Before we end this practice, take a few moments to listen within to what’s present. Just listen, taking a few moments to listen as your mind and body are a little calmer. Maybe there’s clarity of way you can bring in more of this practice of inner calm in your life, whether it’s in your relationships, with yourself, in your work. Just listen within to where this practice of inner calm can be most skillful, most beneficial to you and your loved ones. May we carry forward these qualities of inner and outer calm in all our actions and interactions.

    Micro-practice here:



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  • A Meditation to Bring Comfort and Kindness to Pain and Illness

    A Meditation to Bring Comfort and Kindness to Pain and Illness

    Chronic, complex medical conditions rarely have easy answers—but as meditation teacher Juliana Sloane reminds us in this soothing practice, we can always meet our suffering with creativity, gentleness, and compassion.

    Learning to live with pain and illness is challenging, arduous work. Often, people can go for months or even years without sufficient answers. Life gets turned completely upside down. The body you thought you had suddenly becomes something you don’t recognize or know how to work with. 

    This week, meditation teacher and hypnotherapist Juliana Sloane offers an imaginative meditation that invites softness and self-compassion in the midst of discomfort.

    A Meditation to Bring Comfort and Kindness to Pain and Illness

    Read and practice the guided meditation script below, pausing after each paragraph. Or listen to the audio practice.

    1. In this meditation, we’ll be using some imaginative and mindfulness-based practices to work with discomfort or illness or pain in the body. These practices have been shown to be very supportive for symptom management, as well as finding ways to meet challenging health situations with more patience, more kindness, and more space. 
    2. Begin by getting comfortable, allowing yourself to find a place seated or lying down where you can really relax. Close your eyes if that feels comfortable, or soften your gaze. 
    3. Imagine that right now, any place in your body where you rest your attention could begin to soften and relax and get more comfortable. Begin by resting your attention on the muscles around your mouth. Invite those muscles around your mouth to move into relaxation, ease, comfort, letting those muscles just let go. 
    4. Now notice the space inside your mouth. The surface area of the roof of your mouth, the sides of your cheek. Rest your attention on the back of your tongue. And allowing the back of your tongue to begin to relax. Let that tongue come down maybe from the roof of the mouth or allow it to just soften or loosen or come into resting. 
    5. Bring your awareness to the cheeks and jaw and just let that jaw, those cheeks loosen and soften. You might feel the mouth open slightly as you do, or you might feel those cheeks just get heavier and looser. 
    6. Bring your attention now to the muscles around and behind the eyes. Let those muscles around the eyes relax. 
    7. Move your attention up to the forehead, letting those muscles in the forehead soften and relax. Notice the top of your head and imagine that as you rest your attention there on the top of the head, you could even allow the scalp to relax. 
    8. Now slide your attention down the back of your head, almost like that relaxation could just flow down the back of your head. Down your neck and shoulders, letting those shoulders loosen and soften and relax. 
    9. Notice the space between your shoulder blades, and breathe that sense of softening and relaxation into that space. Let your attention flow down to your arms and hands, inviting every muscle in those arms and hands to begin to relax and soften, as if those arms and hands could just get heavy, as if they’re saturated with that comfort, that ease, that relaxation. 
    10. Let that same softness flow down into your chest and belly. Down into your legs and your feet. 
    11. Now, choose a sensation that doesn’t feel too overwhelming. It might be a specific symptom or a place where there’s pain in the body. Rest your attention there on that place where the symptom has been, or the place where you’re experiencing discomfort. Get a little closer to it with a sense of curiosity and creativity and even resourcefulness. 
    12. Now imagine: if this sensation had a color, what color would it be? You might notice the specific color, whether it’s dark or light. Notice how big that color is, how much space it takes up. Imagine what qualities, what resources this color might need—for example, maybe it needs kindness. Maybe it needs patience. Maybe it needs more understanding. 
    13. Sense into what might support this color here in the body. When you land on that, allow yourself to imagine if that resource, if that supportive quality had a color, what color would that be? Once you have that supportive, beautiful quality in its colo, imagine that you could take this resource, this support, this other helpful color, and you could wrap it around that first color. And as you do, you can imagine that now this supportive color is moving into that space and changing the color of the entire area, filling it with that supportive, resourcing energy of that color. You might imagine this almost like you were wrapping that area with color and that color had a healing balm or a medicinal quality to it as you infuse the space with that color, bringing that kindness or that patience or that understanding. 
    14. Imagine that that supportive, beautiful color could begin to move outward. It could fill the body so that you could rest in this color. 
    15. Spend some quiet time with this image. Notice what’s different. Know that right now, you can send that color that’s so supportive, so soothing into any place it’s needed. Let’s rest in that color for one more moment. Then, gently come back into the room, stretching and opening your eyes.



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  • Are Shame and Guilt Bad—Or Do We Just Need a Different Relationship With Them?

    Are Shame and Guilt Bad—Or Do We Just Need a Different Relationship With Them?

    In the new Apple TV series, Margo Has Money Problems, Michelle Pfeiffer, in a comeback performance, plays a mom, Shyanne, who got pregnant after a one-night stand with a married man. Now her daughter, Margo, whom she raised on her own, has herself given birth to a child with a married man who’s not in the picture.

    At one point, in a parking lot outside the chain restaurant where Margo works, Shyanne has a total breakdown. Having failed at her first stint babysitting her grandchild, she hands over the boy to Margo and shouts that she is a horrible grandmother just as she was a horrible mother: “I wish I could be a better person, but I’m not!…and I will not be judged, by him or anyone else.”

    As much as we may recoil from shame and guilt, these emotions are a part of being human. Yet so many of us, maybe most of us, handle them very poorly.

    This is a classic shame spiral. We start feeling bad about something we’ve done or are unable to do, then leap straight to the appraisal—not of our wrongdoing or inability, but of ourselves: We are bad and we want to hide away because of it, lest we be judged even more.

    Guilt and shame are dirty words, painful words. As much as we may recoil from them, though, these emotions are a part of being human. Yet so many of us, maybe most of us, handle them very poorly. We beat ourselves up psychologically. We beat others up verbally (and in extreme cases physically) in an effort to inflict guilt and shame and retribution for wrongdoing. At a global level, wars are fought and people die out of vengeance—simply because we have so much trouble dealing with how to respond when we do something wrong or are wronged.

    Taking a Closer Look at Guilt and Shame

    Yes, these are tricky emotions, and this is likely not the first time you’ve considered them, but it never hurts to contemplate the thornier sides of life with a fresh mind. If you meditate, you spend your life doing that. Each time, hopefully, with a more open mind.

    To begin, it helps to distinguish guilt and shame.

    Meditation teacher Caverly Morgan expresses the difference succinctly in her book The Heart of Who We Are: “When you feel guilty, there’s a judgment that something you’ve done is wrong. When you feel shame, you believe that your whole self is wrong.”

    Is it realistic to think that an emotion that’s been around as long as anyone can imagine is just going to be removed from the human toolbox?

    Brené Brown, author of the groundbreaking book on human vulnerability, Daring Greatly, says on her website that while guilt is “adaptive and helpful” and can spur accountability for our actions, shame, “the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love and belonging” is neither helpful or productive. She goes on to “call for an end to shame as a tool for change.”

    I’m a huge Brené Brown fan, so I get where she’s going. Shame is so damaging. It ruins whole lives and families (witness Shyanne’s breakdown in the parking lot). And it is quite often wildly ineffective in bringing about change. I’m sure we’ve all tried to shame someone into better behavior only to have it backfire.

    Yet, is it realistic to think that an emotion that’s been around as long as anyone can imagine is just going to be removed from the human toolbox?

    If They’re Not Going Anywhere…How Do We Learn to Live With Them?

    Other researchers are not quite as ready to completely eliminate shame from the spectrum of human responses. Rather, they simply caution us to notice the ways our responses are so very often maladaptive.

    In his recent book, The Power of Guilt, developmental psychologist Chris Moore says we have guilt in the first place to motivate us to repair harms and heal relationships. Shame, he goes on to say, by contrast, tends to make people shy away from interacting with others, leaving a relationship damaged, perhaps permanently. This tendency to descend into a deep dark place makes shame into a dangerous drug.

    Psychologist June Tangney, co-author of Shame and Guilt, however, admits to being shame-prone herself and counsels that it’s possible to be resilient in the midst of shame and divert ourselves from spiraling. In other words, we might be better off accepting that shame is going to emerge and figure out how to work with it more effectively.

    Our problem with shame, then, may not be that as a group we have no need for it, but rather we have a bad habit of taking it way too far.

    Evolutionary psychologists like Dacher Keltner see shame as part of a family of human responses known as the self-conscious emotions—guilt, shame, pride, and embarrassment—that all play a role in regulating social behavior. According to these students of human behavior, “…shame serves the important function of appeasing observers of social transgressions, a function which reestablishes social harmony.” In other words, publicly blushing when you’ve done something wrong signals to others that you know you’ve made a mistake and you care. To say, for example, that someone “has no shame,” means they don’t care what others think about their behavior. Think of certain world leaders who seem to do and say whatever they want, regardless of how immoral or illegal it is, and without concern for the harm those actions cause.

    Our problem with shame, then, may not be that as a group we have no need for it, but rather we have a bad habit of taking it way too far. A very little bit of shame can go a long way. Even a little bit too much can be destructive. The lesson then, seems to be: Shame is likely to be a part of life, respond appropriately and in proportion to that feeling, and focus entirely on action in the future.

    In other words: Do not beat yourself up. Meet the feeling, but don’t build a home there.

    Focusing on Repair

    Knowing how guilt and shame tear at the heart and sever the bonds that hold communities together, spiritual traditions developed forms of atonement—honest acknowledgment of harm, repairing the harm if possible, and vowing not to repeat it.

    Catholics have the confessional and the season of Lent. Judaism has Yom Kippur, the day of atonement. In Islam, tawba, repentance, is practiced continuously, but especially in the last ten days of Ramadan. Twelve-step programs devote several steps to atonement and making amends. While the place of confession in Buddhism is little known, the ancient code of monastic discipline calls for regular acknowledgement of wrongdoing, including in some traditions the collective wrongdoing that has occurred “since beginningless time.”

    It’s not necessary to engage in one of these traditions to develop a healthy relationship with guilt and shame—but it can certainly help to examine our own experience to see how we might be easier on ourselves and on others while still addressing the feelings that emerge when things go wrong.

    Guilt—that uneasy feeling about doing something wrong or not fully showing up—can be a motivator. But as all the researchers, teachers, and commentators here note, it too can gnaw away at us and morph into shame. Fortunately, a practice like mindfulness can help interrupt the descent into needless shame and help us focus on our future actions. In mindfulness practice, we can begin to see what’s happening more clearly and as the ancient prayer goes, forgive our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.



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