Category: Mental Health

  • What Green Spaces Can Do For Your Body, Your Mind & Your Practice

    What Green Spaces Can Do For Your Body, Your Mind & Your Practice

    I live in the heart of a city, and although our neighborhood is usually pretty calm, there’s still that frenetic energy to my surroundings that exists in all urban areas. I sometimes don’t fully clock how busy and bright and beep-y my daily life is until I go somewhere truly far away—a hike on the wild North Shore of Lake Superior, or a cabin where the night sky is genuinely dark and the loudest thing is the birdsong.

    But even here in my city, I am lucky enough to have easy access to green spaces galore. Three lakes are within walking distance, along with public gardens, miles of walking and biking trails, even a bird sanctuary. It’s an embarrassment of riches that I am daily grateful for.

    Every time I step outside—into a nearby park, my own backyard garden, or even a small green strip between buildings—something shifts. My shoulders drop, and my breath deepens. That thing that was churning in my mind a moment ago seems a little less urgent. It’s not gone, but it is quieter. This shift is rarely dramatic, but more just a gentle signal that it’s okay to slow down and let down my defenses.

    Nothing about my external circumstances has changed. Things in my life and in the world are still messy and anxiety-producing. I’ve still got little piles of grief, resentments, obligations, and worries in the dusty corners of my mind and heart. Being human still continues.

    Still, I know that the experience I’m having when I get outside isn’t just a nice feeling. Something subtle but real is happening in my brain and my body. And while the mind/body/heart delineation is always somewhat contrived—after all, we’re always whole beings having all these varied physical and emotional experiences—a growing body of research is saying: what’s happening in these natural spaces is worth paying attention to.

    What Happens in Your Body

    When we talk about nature being soothing, we’re not just speaking poetically. When we take time to walk through or sit in the natural world, it is actually dialing down our stress hormones in real time.

    In a 2019 study published in Frontiers in Psychology, researchers tracked urban dwellers over eight weeks and found that a nature experience produced a 21.3% per hour drop in cortisol levels, with the most concentrated benefits occurring between 20 and 30 minutes outside. A 2025 meta-analysis across 78 studies confirmed the pattern: exposure to green spaces decreased salivary cortisol by 21% and salivary amylase by 28%, which is a fancy way of saying that even our spit provides evidence of significant reductions in the body’s stress response.

    Stepping outside for half an hour might be one of the most underrated meditation preparations we have.

    Salivary amylase is a marker of sympathetic nervous system activation—the same fight-or-flight wiring that gets overworked when we’re anxious, overwhelmed, doom-scrolling (I know it’s not just me, right?), or simply living in the modern world.

    When it drops, the body is shifting toward a sense of safety and rest. It’s settling into the very state that meditation practitioners often spend years learning to access.

    What if stepping outside for half an hour is one of the most underrated meditation preparations we have?

    What Happens in Your Heart

    There’s something else that nature does, a little harder to quantify but no less real: it stops us in our tracks. It makes us feel small—but in the most expansive way.

    Researchers (and poets and mystics) call this “awe,” and natural environments are among its most reliable triggers. In one fascinating study, students who spent just one minute looking up at a stand of tall eucalyptus trees showed measurable increases in awe and significantly more generous, helpful behavior than those who had looked at a building. Imagine the implications if sixty seconds of looking at trees makes us kinder and more gracious towards others.

    Awe is a way to feel small that is deeply enlivening, because part of awe is also a feeling of being held and connected by something larger, more beautiful, and communal.

    We generally don’t like to feel small, and a lot of our current state of nonstop agitation comes from armoring ourselves against the fear and defensiveness that arises in us when we feel pressed down by larger, more aggressive forces that seem to want us to feel insignificant.

    Awe is a way to feel small that is also deeply enlivening, because part of awe is also a feeling of being held and connected to something larger, more beautiful, and communal. The group of astronauts on the recent Artemis II mission talked about this often and openly, and their shared sense of wonder magnetically drew in millions of followers. They offered living proof that there’s something bigger than this moment of strife. That sense of connection they described—the truth of our interdependence, which I think deep down we are all starved to feel and believe in again—is quieter and much more real than the blaring comment sections of social media that are constantly shouting at us about how separate and hopelessly broken we all are.

    The sterility and atomization of modern life tends to rob us of these essential human experiences of awe and wonder, and the natural world tends to replenish them.

    The Paradox of Awe, Surrender, and Beginner’s Mind

    What research is finding is something contemplatives have long pointed to: a loosening of the ego, a softening of that grasping sense that we have to be the center of everything in order to feel alright. In meditation, this letting go of our need to feel special and smart is a quality we sometimes call “beginner’s mind.” It’s a place where it is okay to admit that we don’t know a whole bunch of things, maybe most things, and it’s also okay that we don’t know.

    Yes, life is serious sometimes, but often not in the ways we imagine. Meditation is, in part, a way of gently reminding ourselves that we don’t have to take ourselves so dang seriously all the time.

    As the poet Mary Oliver wrote while watching a gathering of goldfinches:

    ...it is a serious thing

    just to be alive
            on this fresh morning
                    in the broken world.
                           I beg of you,

    do not walk by
            without pausing
                    to attend to this…

    The great irony, of course, is that in that moment of surrender, we actually open ourselves up to a fresh set of possibilities that our certainty and desperate need to feel big tend to foreclose us to. The “I don’t know” becomes the doorway to wisdom, and the “I don’t have to be special by the world’s standards” becomes a way to access a sense of real, unconditional belonging and belovedness, even in our imperfection.

    Meditation can help unlock these states of expansive, cradled surrender. It turns out a canopy of trees, a wide-open field, or the particular shimmering quality of late-afternoon light through leaves can take us there, too.

    Meditation can help unlock these states of expansive, cradled surrender. It turns out a canopy of trees, a wide-open field, or the particular shimmering quality of late-afternoon light through leaves can take us there, too.

    What Happens in Your Mind

    If you’ve ever tried to meditate after a long day at the computer and found your mind spinning, there’s a reason for that—and spending some time in green spaces can help with this, too.

    Attention Restoration Theory proposes that mental fatigue and concentration can be improved by time spent in, or even just looking at, green spaces. It suggests that natural environments encourage more effortless brain function, allowing directed attention to rest and replenish itself. Our focused, striving attention—the kind we use to meet deadlines, manage inboxes, and navigate hard conversations—is a finite resource. It gets depleted. And ordinary urban environments, with their constant demands and stimulation, keep drawing from that well.

    Natural environments evoke what researchers call “soft fascination.” Isn’t that a gorgeous phrase? This is an effortless, gentle form of attention, similar to mind-wandering but still directed outward. It allows our directed attention to rest while the mind quietly restores itself. Think of how your whole being feels when you’re watching a drifting cloud or noticing the way wind undulates a field of wild grasses, or what happens when you just sit and listen to the sound of rain drop-drop-dropping into a lake. These things don’t demand anything of us. They simply invite us to be present—which is, of course, the whole point.

    A Gentle Green-Space Invitation

    The research is compelling, but I know that you don’t need a study to tell you what you’ve likely already felt. Nature returns us to something. It slows us down, opens us up, and reminds us that we are part of something much larger than the constantly-shuffling contents of our minds.

    Whether it’s a 20-minute walk before your morning sit, a lunch break in the park, or simply pausing to notice a patch of sky—time outside is time well spent. It offers a balm for your nervous system, nurtures your sense of wonder, and encourages the quiet, open awareness that sits at the heart of our practice.



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  • Democracy Does Not Work Without Mindfulness

    Democracy Does Not Work Without Mindfulness

    When I speak about “democracy” here, please make a distinction in your mind between what democracy once aspired to be and what it has become. Real democracy is not a political war, and it is not something we do only on election days. It is not focused solely, or chiefly, on winning expensive political campaigns.

    True democracy is how people like you and me work together across disagreements and divisions to care for ourselves, for each other, and for the life we share.

    True democracy is how people like you and me work together across disagreements and divisions to care for ourselves, for each other, and for the life we share.

    And true democracy does not work without mindfulness.

    Democracy demands the skills we learn by practicing mindfulness: paying attention, slowing down, listening carefully, looking deeply, pausing judgment, sitting with strong emotions.

    Mindfulness is how we keep from being overwhelmed, or at least from feeling overwhelmed about being overwhelmed. Practicing mindfulness, we learn how to respond to life, not just react to it.

    Mindfulness is how we reclaim the ability to make deliberate, considered choices about how we engage with life and with challenges. Mindfulness is how we recover our agency as human beings—and this is another reason why democracy does not work without mindfulness.

    An Unrecognized Foundation of Democracy

    Years of studying democracy as a scholar, and of teaching university students to be citizens and civic leaders, has convinced me that mindfulness is the foundation of civic education. In my new book On Mindful Democracy (Parallax, 2026), I argue that for democracy to regain its power to change lives and worlds, we the people must learn to live more mindfully.

    We must learn to practice “mindful democracy.”

    Start With Attention

    Mindfulness begins as a practice of learning to pay attention to whatever is happening in this moment. 

    It’s hard to enjoy life, or to effect any kind of real change, if we’re unable to focus on what is happening. Practicing mindfulness builds the power of concentration, something that eludes many of us in the attention economy of social media. Without this foundational power of attention, democracy does not work.

    Slow Down

    Once we have trained ourselves to pay attention, the practice of mindfulness turns toward slowing down and looking deeply. A distracted mind is like a lake on a windy day—the waves roar, churning up the muck and making it impossible to see to the bottom of things. 

    By focusing and stilling the mind, it becomes possible to look deeply and gain new insights into ourselves and this life.

    We Love Independence. What About Interdependence?

    One profound insight of mindfulness practice is that everything is interconnected in a web of cause and effect. The world is constantly changing, and it is changing together in an intricate dance of individuals and ensembles. Everything that exists is contingent upon an infinity of other things for its existence; change one thing, and everything else changes, too. Nothing, and no one, is truly apart. 

    The man that introduced many people in North America and Europe to mindfulness, Thich Nhat Hanh, coined the term “interbeing” to describe this reality. Interbeing means “this is because that is.” This implies that every “I” is also a “We,” every life an example of cooperation. In the words of the great poet of democracy, Walt Whitman, “I am large, I contain multitudes.” 

    All being is interbeing. All independence is also interdependence.

    All being is interbeing. All independence is also interdependence.

    Mindfulness and Re-Imagining Us vs. Them

    Most of us have been conditioned since childhood to see the world in terms of what I call “enemyship”: friends vs. enemies. 

    In the process, we’ve lost track of how deeply interconnected we truly are. A jewel of mindfulness practice is that it wakes us up to our interdependence, potentially correcting one of our culture’s greatest blind spots. 

    It’s not enough to simply understand interdependence on an intellectual level. Mindfulness opens us to experiencing interdependence in an embodied way. Yes, we understand in our minds that our fates are bound, but we also feel it in our hearts, see it in our breath, and hear it in our words. We recognize that life is not a zero-sum game in which your joy somehow diminishes mine, and that happiness is not an apple pie with a limited number of slices.

    Mindfulness shows us that, at our core, we are not opposed. This is an essential realization for democracy, which requires learning to disagree—and still work together to reduce suffering—without turning each other into enemies. 

    Mindfulness shows us that, at our core, we are not opposed. This is an essential realization for democracy, which requires learning to disagree—and still work together to reduce suffering—without turning each other into enemies. 

    In the real world, this mindful concept of connection has profound implications for our individual and collective lives: If you suffer less, I will suffer less, for you will be less likely to inflict your suffering on me. And if we suffer less, all of us suffer less, for we will be less likely to inflict our suffering on the world. All of us benefit when there is less suffering, and more joy, in the world: which, of course, is a foundational goal of democracy. 

    We live in a culture that seems determined to get us down—on ourselves and on each other. Hope is in short supply. But even in moments of conflict, division, and great suffering, like this one, the conditions for transformation are also present. 

    We already have the things we most need to build a more loving and compassionate world: we have each other, and we have our mindfulness practice.



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  • A 12-Minute Meditation to Meet Yourself Where You Are—Right Now

    A 12-Minute Meditation to Meet Yourself Where You Are—Right Now

    Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction instructor Cheryl Jones leads us in a practice to foster self-acceptance in any life circumstance.

    Mindfulness meditation involves a willingness to be with ourselves as we are. It offers a way of learning to work with ourselves, and not on ourselves, especially if you are healing from perfectionism.

    So what does it look like to simply meet yourself, regardless of what’s going on or how you’re feeling?

    In this guided practice with Cheryl Jones, we can start to notice whatever is happening within us and around us with curiosity and kindness. Mindfulness reminds us that not everything has to be “fixed”—and very often, our movement back to wellness starts when we stop trying to change ourselves and simply accept where we are with care and attention.

    A Meditation to Meet Yourself Where You Are—No Matter What

    Read and practice the guided meditation script below, pausing after each paragraph. Or listen to the audio practice.

    1. Find your way to an upright and dignified posture. Close your eyes or lower your eyes in a soft gaze. Place your feet on the ground and relax your arms at your sides. Rest your hands in your lap. Draw your shoulder blades subtly toward each other, allowing the chin to be parallel with the floor. Lift the crown of your head toward the sky. Perhaps soften the belly and the jaw.
    2. Notice what it feels like to stop. Notice what it feels like to be sitting in this purposeful posture in this moment, in this space. And perhaps now take a moment to welcome yourself to your practice, acknowledging your willingness to be here for yourself in this way.
    3. Notice that you are breathing. There’s no need to change or manipulate the breath in any way. Allow the breath to be just as it is right here, right now. Simply follow the breath in and follow the breath out.
    4. Notice where you feel the sensations of the breath. Perhaps you’re aware of the air moving in and out at the nostrils and the upper lip. You could possibly be sensing the gentle expanding and contracting of the chest and ribs. Maybe you feel the abdomen rising and sinking. Allow your attention to rest on the sensations of the breath as it flows in and out of the body.
    5. As you’re sitting here with the attention on the breath, just meet yourself. You may notice thoughts going through the mind. There’s no need to block thoughts out. Rather, see if it is possible to allow thoughts to pass through the mind one by one. Let go of any need to label thoughts as positive or negative. Good or bad. Find a neutral way to be with your thoughts. See if it’s possible to be aware of thoughts without grasping or clinging to any one thought. And also without rejecting or denying any particular thought.
    6. Shift your attention now to any feelings that may be present in this moment. Breathing in and breathing out. Acknowledge any feeling just as it is. Sometimes we have feelings about our feelings. We may feel that one feeling is OK or acceptable while another is not. All feelings are acceptable.
    7. Now, bring your awareness to sensations within the body. Warmth. Coolness. Tingling. Tightness. Pulsation. Relaxation. Hunger. Fullness. Notice what’s happening within the body in this moment. Do this with patience and kindness. Explore sensations both strong and subtle with curiosity.
    8. As you breathe in and breathe out, notice if your posture has shifted. And then make any adjustments, if you’d like. Allow yourself to tune in to the body just as it is.
    9. Center your attention on only the breath now. And as we near the end of this practice, follow three more full cycles of breathing. Be as present as possible for each one. Remember this place of awareness is always available to you because it’s within you.
    10. As you feel ready, allow your eyes to open gently if they were closed. Get reacquainted with your surroundings and prepare to reengage with the day. Perhaps set an intention to bring awareness to all that you do and into each interaction.
    A 15-Minute Meditation for Self-Acceptance 

    On some level, many of us are healing from perfectionism, but with mindfulness we can learn to embrace our flaws. Cheryl Jones, founder of The Mindful Path, shares a guided practice to be with ourselves as we are. Read More 



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  • Raising Happy Children In Challenging Times: Practices that Build  Essential Skills For Well-Being

    Raising Happy Children In Challenging Times: Practices that Build  Essential Skills For Well-Being

    Sometimes happiness might seem like a stretch—for us and even for our children. The stresses of daily life, getting out the door in the morning, managing a household, coordinating schedules, as well as the bigger issues, including concern about the struggles in the world, can all take a toll on us as adults. Given the increasing issues with children’s mental health, we know it’s taking a toll on our children as well.

    And yet, amid difficulties, happiness is still attainable and essential to well-being and resilience. Research on adult well-being shows that there are specific steps we can take to develop and nurture happiness. 

    As James Baraz writes, joy is “a general feeling of aliveness and well-being that is characterized by meeting ups and downs in life with authenticity and perspective.” 

    Based on our work with children, we know this is true for them, as well. It can be as simple as enjoying a hug, being mesmerized by a ladybug, or giggling at the shape of a cloud. These simple pleasures can be little moments of joy for our children and for us—and they can be a part of raising happy children who are resilient, even in the middle of normal ups and downs.

    Not Denying Difficulty, But Opening to Possibility

    When we talk about raising happy children, we are not talking about “happiness” as the fleeting emotion that is a response to good or fun things. We are not suggesting pushing difficulties aside, but instead developing the capacity to hold them alongside our well-being. As James Baraz writes in Awakening Joy, joy is “a general feeling of aliveness and well-being that is characterized by meeting ups and downs in life with authenticity and perspective.” 

    We envision a happy child as one with a developing sense of ease with themselves, one who often sees and enjoys the good around them and within themselves. 

    Happiness is not a destination or something to be achieved, but rather what Chang Meng Tan, author of Search Inside Yourself, defines as “a deep sense of flourishing that arises from an exceptionally healthy mind.”

    We envision a happy child as one with a developing sense of ease with themselves, one who often sees and enjoys the good around them and within themselves. 

    Research by the Center for Healthy Minds shows that well-being is a learnable skill. There are multiple evidence-based perspectives offering practical ideas for cultivating happiness. 

    In particular, The Resilience Project by Hugh Van Cuylenburg focuses on gratitude, empathy, and mindfulness to support resilience and happiness. The Action for Happiness Project has a similar focus and lists mindfulness, gratitude, and kindness as core skills. In Hardwiring Happiness, Rick Hanson adds to this list and stresses the importance of inclining the mind, or being on the lookout, for happiness and then taking it in. 

    Raising Happy Children Starts by Building Well-Being Skills Together

    Here are three fun activities based on these frameworks to try with your child.

    Inclining The Mind And Taking It In Practice: Glimmer Wand

    Glimmers, coined by Deb Dana, are little moments of peace, safety, and happiness. 

    Cut out, decorate, and glue a star on top of a popsicle or other stick. You can write “catching glimmers” on the star. Share about glimmers and use the wand to “cast a spell” to notice and enjoy glimmers that day. You can also wave it overhead as people share their glimmers and how they make them feel. 

    The brain has a negativity bias. By pausing to seek out glimmers, we can train our brains to notice and savor delight more often.

    Gratitude Practice: Gratitude Sandwich

    Children can draw and cut out pictures of five things or people they are grateful for as their sandwich fillings. 

    • Cut two pieces of paper for the sandwich bread.
    • Glue one piece of the “bread“ to the top and one to the bottom of a poster. 
    • Paste the fillings between the bread (or Velcro so it’s interchangeable).
    • Write Gratitude Sandwich and “I am grateful for…” on the “bread.”
    • Leave the sandwich somewhere visible and use it as a conversation starter about gratitude. 

    Dr. Robert Emmons at UC Davis found that feeling gratitude can move our nervous system out of the stress response. Giving children a visual link to things that foster feelings of gratitude can help strengthen the body-brain connection and develop positive neural pathways.

    Cultivating happiness can be quite simple if we focus on it, even when things are hard. Pausing to notice and take in the good, feeling gratitude, and connecting with others with empathy and kindness in the tiny moments of our day can make a genuine difference. 

    Have the child think about five people who make them feel loved or happy.

    • String a bead for each person onto a pipe cleaner. 
    • Twist the ends together so the beads don’t fall off. These are links of love.
    • Have them touch one bead at a time and remember the special person. 
    • Take a breath in, taking in their love, and out, offering love back to them.
    • Encourage them to notice how they feel. The links of love can be attached to a backpack, worn around a wrist, or left in a visible location. 

    Especially when a child feels lonely or insecure, having a physical anchor can remind them that they are worthy and loved.

    Tuning Attention Towards Happiness

    Cultivating happiness can be quite simple if we focus on it, even when things are hard. Pausing to notice and take in the good, feeling gratitude, and connecting with others with empathy and kindness in the tiny moments of our day can make a genuine difference. 

    Fun, hands-on activities, like those above, can help both adults and children lean into happiness and create space for more joy in our lives.


    Would you like more support building habits of well-being and resilience in your child? Try our new card deck, available April 21. Let’s Grow Happiness includes 50 activity cards to help kids build gratitude, self-compassion, and emotional regulation skills.



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  • The Gift of Being Alive: A Q&A with Rhonda Magee

    The Gift of Being Alive: A Q&A with Rhonda Magee

    We need the wisdom of cool heads and open hearts more than ever, and part of how we get to that wisdom is by (counterintuitively) allowing the fullness of our human experience, including our anger. Here we revisit a Q&A with Rhonda Magee as she explores the complexity, frustration, and intimate beauty of learning to make and be peace in the world.

    Stephanie Domet: In your book The Inner Work of Racial Justice, you detail the steps you took to help one of your students process his attitudes and biases. What kind of energy does that work require?

    Rhonda Magee: It requires a certain kind of commitment, a certain willingness to turn toward that which we could so easily deflect, turn away from, deny, minimize, avoid. For me it’s really important that when these opportunities present themselves for us to look into what’s arising around this, we turn in to that opportunity as opposed to away from it. I also think it takes a kind of grounding in a certain kind of love—kindness, loving-kindness— for me it takes some feeling of the value, of the possibility of connecting across lots of difference and the importance and value of trying to do it, again and again, even when it’s difficult. 

    SD: Why is it worth it to you to do this work?

    RM: In my view, absolutely everything is connected, and that means all of us are connected, and so it seems to me that when we have these opportunities to expand the sense of our common ground, and we don’t take advantage of them and we don’t do what we can to heal and repair and transform the world, then it seems to me we are in effect contributing to barriers and obstacles to deep well-being. And so for me it’s worth it because it’s about practice. It arises out of deep practice for me—it arises out of the deep ethical ground of my practice.

    SD: Who does that work serve? Is it for yourself, for the other person, the greater good of society? To honor the practice?

    RM: It serves life. The gift of literally being alive. To me that’s not about any one of us, actually. To be alive is a great gift, and therefore the only real response to such a gift is gratitude. And a way to show gratitude is to try to minimize harm wherever it arises, as best we can. Recognizing we’re not perfect, that we’re not always able to see clearly how what we’re doing contributes to harm, we’re all vulnerable and misguided in our own ways, so it’s with a lot of humility that I say this. But ultimately, I think this question of who does it benefit, it benefits life.

    SD: For a racialized person, a racialized woman, there are microaggressions everywhere. How do you take care of yourself to ensure you can do this work you want to do and feel called to do?

    RM: It has come out of a sense of my own agency and what I often call personal justice. This idea that justice starts with us, how we treat ourselves. Taking care of myself feels like the first approximation of whatever it is I’m trying to offer in the world. There’s a reason I live in San Francisco as opposed to North Carolina or Virginia, where I was born and raised. The environment in San Francisco seems a bit more conducive to this way of accepting people, working across cultures, multiculturally, working with people who have different ways of expressing themselves, whether it be about race, sexual orientation, religion, immigration status. I specifically talk about the environment first and then the practices. We tend to think that from the practices we can overcome just about everything and that’s a good way to think, but I don’t want to miss this opportunity to name the relevance of our embeddedness in the world, and what’s possible is, in some measure, aided and abetted and shaped by the circumstances, the environments, the structures and systems that we find ourselves bathing in all the time. I live in a community that provides a certain amount of buffer against some of the worst kinds of disrespect that a person like me might find out in the world. From this place of relative protectedness, then I actually am able to give even more. We have to keep fighting for opportunities for people who today are suffering from a new set of oppressive systems.

    SD: I wonder about your take on callout culture, or cancel culture. Is there a value in that approach, too? Your approach is one on one, which feels righteous, but slow. But what about other big-impact approaches? Do they also move the ball down the field?

    RM: In the social justice arenas we may have overamplified some of the sharper ways of dealing with this. That’s not to say there aren’t times when we really need to take a strong, sharp stand. It takes a certain skill to act firmly and clearly and do so in a way that can minimize rather than exacerbate patterns of disconnect and separation. For me it’s never about just changing places with the people or processes that have been causing harm. It’s really about bringing around a new way of being with each other. There’s a certain urgency to figuring out how to work for some notion of justice and how to end oppression, but how to do that in a way that opens the heart, and that expands the capacity of all of us to be agents of a kind of public love that can help us sustain human life. Because the universe is going to go on in whatever way, but human life is vulnerable right now because of our failure to figure out how to live more gently and effectively together on this planet and to appreciate this brief opportunity we have between the birth and the death date to make a positive impact on this world.

    “There is a way that even in the darkest times—intergenerationally dark times where there’s no reason to think your children will ever get out of this—there’s a way to love.”

    SD: Do you ever lose your cool?

    RM: I often lose my cool intentionally, as a tool for my own healing. If I’m feeling agitation and despair or some sudden rage at something I hear that seems completely nuts, my own practice journey at the moment is allowing those feelings to be expressed and as much as possible doing that regularly enough that they’re not creating a boiler that is going to explode out there. So if I’m here, at home, where it’s safe, it’s part of my practice to let the anger and the rage that I feel about injustice come right out. There are so many things happening that if you are willing to look at these difficult issues—I mean, my heart is breaking all day every day. I hum, I sing more nowadays, I hum and sing with others more nowadays. Singing, holding hands, humming, those are ways that human beings have across times and cultures managed to get through difficult times together. I sometimes forget just how many generations of human beings before recorded human history—for hundreds of thousands of years we don’t know the numbers of battles, rages, the despair, the inhumanity to each other, and yet we survived, and yet we didn’t burn down the planet, and yet we figured out how to keep getting up every day and feeding the children. There’s a planet’s worth of wisdom about how to get through difficult times and about the holistic nature of what that takes, so that’s what I’m about these days.

    SD: I thought losing your cool would look more like—I don’t know—do you ever want to swipe all those books off the bookcase behind you?

    RM: I mean, sometimes! When I hear this I’m tempted to think of those who say: We just need to start all over again. Blow it up and start all over. I don’t have kids, I’m not physically a mother, but I kind of feel like most moms and most of us in these communities that have suffered a lot over time, you know, we’re here. We’re usually not the ones who say let’s burn it all down. Because our children are in that. The things we have lovingly protected from the worst, as best we could through generations, whether through slavery or whatever our cultures and heritages have suffered through, we suffered through so we could live another day and find the sources of hope and regeneration. That mothering instinct, I believe it’s in all of us on some level, that instinct that would protect, that would go into the fire and pull out what we can and start again, mindfulness of that, cultivation of that is what I feel called to help support and that comes at least in part from my own particular lineage as the granddaughter of the granddaughter of formerly enslaved people. There is a way that even in the darkest times, intergenerationally dark times where there’s no reason to think your children will ever get out of this, there’s a way to love, to help bring about places where joy and healing can happen, and my goodness, if people could do it during much darker times, the holocausts of our history, the enslavement periods of our history—if it could be done then, then we can do it now. I have some love and compassion for those who feel so beleaguered that the call is just to burn it down. And I say, before you light that match, look into the eyes of a child, hold the hand of a friend, realize that these very human gestures matter, and look for that will, that capacity to live another day in love.

    SD: When I look at what’s happening in the world today, the level of unrest and aggression, hate and burning, I see a lot of “men in the room.” What do you think about the role of women in helping bring about this “new way of being with each other”?

    RM: I sometimes think of this in the conventional terms of identity—it seems obvious that we need more women in power! But I also think that more fundamentally and importantly, we need to see more empowered feminine energy in the world: that energy which lives in all of us—to greater or lesser degrees—the energy that nurtures, that cares, that sees the imprint of the future and the past in everyone and in everything we do. Any one of us can do this. And every one of us should.

    Educating by Being Aware of Others’ Experiences 

    https://vimeo.com/350988714 Whether we’re a teacher, whether we’re a director, whether we’re an administrative assistant, whatever we are because who we are and what our upbringing has been and what our life experiences have been is intricately a part of our authentic being. Unless we have taken time to look at… Read More 

    • Barb Catbagan
    • August 21, 2019
    12 Powerful Women of the Mindfulness Movement 

    There’s a balancing of gender power happening across the professional world—including the mindfulness world. Twelve leaders in the field share how they claim their power and bring the diversity of their experiences in the mindfulness movement to bear in their work. Read More 

    • Stephanie Domet
    • January 15, 2019

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  • How Writing Three Lines of Poetry Can Open Your Heart

    How Writing Three Lines of Poetry Can Open Your Heart

    Poetry can be a kind of meditation, explains Rashid Hughes. He explores how the art of haiku can open your heart and bring a sense of peaceful, awe-inspired expressiveness into your practice.

    Life has so much to offer, if we’d only listen. The evening was young and my body tired from being in motion all day. There was an intrinsic quietness in the air, with gray skies above and an unceasing but very tender rainfall. I sat at my desk, looking out of my back window as I often do after a long day of reading or writing. The usual sounds of insects and animals on a late summer evening seemed to be very few. The candle flame to my left on my ancestor altar reminded me of the sacredness of resting, so I allowed myself a moment to just be. I enjoy cracking my window a little to listen to the rain with the coincidental thunder on the horizon. As I feel on many rainy days, I felt like the rain was inviting me to listen deeply, so I obeyed.

    As I sat enjoying the rain for a while, I began reflecting on a few words from mama Alice Walker’s poem “Be Nobody’s Darling.”

    Be nobody’s darling;
    Be an outcast

    Be an outcast;
    Be pleased to walk alone

    I felt alone, but not separate. I exhaled. Something sacred was in the midst: an undivided knowing. A deeply-rooted conviction of belonging arose within me. It was as if I was bearing witness to my boundless love. In awe, I surrendered.

    From within this knowing, the following haikus came to me in a very spontaneous, unstructured way. In that moment, life felt both intimate and imminent. A solitude and a fresh clarity caressed me; a moment of effortless meditation unfolding. There was no goal or desire present, just present-moment awareness.

    I’m not sure why haiku was the form of writing that came to me at the moment. Poetry or writing isn’t how I usually express myself after meditation. I may jot down a few notes, but hardly ever in the form of poetry. I tend to prefer to bathe in the natural clarity of mind after moments like this. Maybe haiku emerged due to the natural slowness of pacing and spaciousness that is required throughout the haiku poetic process. Who knows?

    With the window slightly opened, allowing the sound of the gentle rain and a soft breeze in, I began to write these haikus.

    Poetry Can Be a Kind of Meditation

    If you don’t understand the meaning of the haikus, that’s OK. The gift of haiku is the patience that is invoked, the wonder, and, on special occasions, the confusion. You may sense that there are many possible interpretations of a haiku. That’s OK too; let all be both true and untrue. I invite you to take a breath in between reading each haiku.

    A different knowing
    That enters me from beneath.
    They frown at me, Shrink!

    I hear them calling
    In the cool breeze on my feet.
    I contract, it’s me!

    It’s time to slow down.
    What shall my five year plan be?
    It’s night time, don’t sleep!

    Overcast, light rain.
    The sunshine of so much grief
    Felt within the peace.

    Yaaaass, dreadlocks and beard!
    The way they stare in the streets
    Feels like, please don’t shoot!

    The leaf’s holding on,
    Fall, a few yellows and pinks.
    No hurry, just be

    A candle burns bright.
    Walking back and forth I think,
    Tomorrow not now.

    Try Your Hand at Haiku

    It is my wish that everyone might be able to find joy in writing haikus. It really can slow your mind down and open your heart when you need it most. Here are a few tips to get you started.

    1. Go for a walk or sit in your favorite seat at home.
    2. Observe your surroundings. Notice the colors, the weather, the sounds.
    3. Listen to your heart and sense what is happening within.
    4. Without much thinking, in two sentences, pause and write down what is capturing your attention.
    5. Then write a third sentence that is not as closely related to the first two sentences.
    6. See if you can draw some surprising connection between the first two sentences and the the third.
    7. Remember, try to really get clear on what insight or message you want to reveal to the reader.
    8. If you’d like a challenge, rewrite the three sentences following the traditional haiku structure: three lines, with five syllables in the first line, seven in the second, and five in the third.
    9. Most importantly, don’t judge yourself for what you come up with.
    Try This Guided Meditation As a Mindful Writing Prompt 

    The invitation is to connect with your senses in a real or imagined setting. What do you hear? What do you smell? Note the emotional content of the space. And when you’re done, take what you learned to the page in whatever way suits you. Read More 

    • Stephanie Domet
    • June 10, 2024



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  • Create Inner Balance With A 12-Minute Meditation

    Create Inner Balance With A 12-Minute Meditation

    Life is never constant. And it can be difficult to remain balanced in the midst of change. Susan Bauer-Wu shares a guided meditation to ground us in the present moment and cultivate equanimity.

    With equanimity, we can feel the possibility of balance in our hearts in the midst of life’s ups and downs. It’s a quality that’s both receptive and stable. In short, it’s the opposite of the reactive mind. With equanimity, there’s a feeling of ease and allowing as we ride the waves of change and different experiences. It allows us to be present to suffering and present to joy. It combines an understanding mind together with a compassionate heart. It doesn’t mean we are indifferent or that we don’t care or that we care less, it means we allow life to unfold without any attachments to an outcome or taking things personally. And finally, equanimity is opening to easing into each moment with care and gentleness. 

    A Meditation to Create Inner Balance in the Face of Change

    Read and practice the guided meditation script below, pausing after each paragraph. Or listen to the audio practice.

    1. Settle into a comfortable posture. You can close your eyes or simply lower your gaze. Bring awareness toward your body. Notice your breath move through your body, feeling the chest or belly expand with your breath.
    2. Take a moment to set an intention for the practice. Perhaps it’s to feel a sense of inner balance and ease. Take in the following phrases or the meaning of the phrases and quietly repeat to yourself: Things are just as they are. I’m safe in this moment. My happiness and suffering depend on my thoughts and actions, not simply upon my wishes. May I feel joy and ease.
    3. Notice whatever is present for you right now. Resting in a feeling of OK-ness in this moment, just as it is.
    4. Bring to mind someone who you care about and who may be going through a hard time. Extend these phrases or the meaning of the phrases to this person. I care for you yet cannot keep you from suffering. I love you yet cannot control your happiness. Your happiness and suffering depend on your thoughts and actions and not my wishes for you. May you feel joy and ease.
    5. Notice how you feel. Notice the raw feeling of whatever is present for you. Sit with it. Just letting it be, right now.
    6. Once again, bring awareness to the body, and the breath. Feel the ease of simply being and breathing. 
    Interested in Meditation? Here Are the Basics 

    Meditation is a core mindfulness practice that you can customize to meet you where you are, bring your attention to the present moment, and engage in more compassion and connection. Here’s what you need to know to get started. Read More 

    • Eric Langshur and Nate Klemp
    • May 21, 2021



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  • Be Kind to Yourself by Being Kind to Others

    Be Kind to Yourself by Being Kind to Others

    I usually describe a practice as something to do: get on your own side, see the being behind the eyes, take in the good, etc. This practice is different: it’s something to recognize. From this recognition, appropriate action will follow. Let me explain.

    Some years ago, I was invited to give a keynote at a conference with the largest audience I’d ever faced. It was a big step up for me. Legendary psychologists were giving the other talks, and I feared I wouldn’t measure up. I was nervous. Real nervous.

    I sat in the back waiting my turn, worrying about how people would see me. I thought about how to look impressive and get approval. My mind fixed on me, me, me. I was miserable.

    Then I began reading an interview with the Dalai Lama. He spoke about the happiness in wishing others well. A wave of relief and calming swept through me as I recognized that the kindest thing I could do for myself was to stop obsessing about “me” and instead try to be helpful to others.

    So I gave my talk, and stayed focused on what could be useful to people rather than how I was coming across. I felt much more relaxed and at peace—and received a standing ovation. I laughed to myself at the ironies: to get approval, stop seeking it; to take care of yourself, take care of others.

    This principle holds in everyday life, not just in conferences. If you get a sense of other people and find compassion for them, you’ll feel better yourself. In a relationship, one of the best ways to get your own needs met is to take maximum reasonable responsibility (these words are carefully chosen) for meeting the needs of the other person. Besides being benevolent—which feels good in its own right—it’s your best odds strategy for getting treated better by others. This approach is the opposite of being a doormat; it puts you in a stronger position.

    Kindness to you is kindness to me; kindness to me is kindness to you. It’s a genuine—and beautiful—two-way street.

    Flip it the other way, and it is also true: being to yourself is being kind to others. As your own well-being increases, you’re more able and likely to be patient, supportive, forgiving, and loving. To take care of them, you’ve got to take care of yourself; otherwise you start running on empty. As you grow happiness and other inner strengths inside yourself, you’ve got more to offer to others.

    Kindness to you is kindness to me; kindness to me is kindness to you. It’s a genuine—and beautiful—two-way street.

    What Does Being Kind to Others and Yourself Look Like?

    The kindness to others and to yourself that I’m talking about here is authentic and proportionate, not overblown or inappropriate.

    In ordinary situations, take a moment here and there to recognize that if you open to appropriate compassion, decency, tolerance, respect, support, friendliness, or even love for others…it’s good for you as well.

    See the consequences of little things. For example, earlier today, in an airport, I saw a bag on the ground and didn’t know if it had been left by someone. Thinking about this practice, it was natural for there to be some friendliness in my face when I asked the man in front of me if it was his bag. He was startled at first and it seemed like he felt criticized, then he looked more closely at me, relaxed a bit, and said that the bag was his friend’s. His response to my friendliness made me feel at ease instead of awkward or tense.

    See how taking care of yourself has good ripple effects for others. Deliberately do a small thing that feeds you—a little rest, some exercise, some time for yourself—and then notice how this affects your relationships.

    Imagine what the other person’s concerns or wants might be, and do what you can—usually easily and naturally—to take them into account. Then see how this turns out for you. Probably better than it would have been.

    Also see how taking care of yourself has good ripple effects for others. Deliberately do a small thing that feeds you—a little rest, some exercise, some time for yourself—and then notice how this affects your relationships. Notice how healthy boundaries in relationships helps prevent you from getting used up or angry and eventually needing to withdraw.

    It’s as if we are connected in a vast web. For better or worse, what you do to others ripples back to you; what you do to yourself ripples out to others.

    In effect, you are running little experiments and letting the results really sink in. That’s the important part: letting it really land inside you that we are deeply connected with each other. Helping others helps you; helping yourself helps others. Similarly, harming others harms you; harming yourself harms others.

    It’s as if we are connected in a vast web. For better or worse, what you do to others ripples back to you; what you do to yourself ripples out to others.

    Recognizing this in your belly and bones will change your life for the better. And change the lives of others for the better as well.

      This post is one in a series from Rick Hanson’s Just One Thing (JOT) newsletter, which each week offers a simple practice designed to bring you more joy, more fulfilling relationships, and more peace of mind and heart.  



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  • Being Courageous About Change: Mindful Guidance on the Proactive Pivot

    Being Courageous About Change: Mindful Guidance on the Proactive Pivot

    Being Proactive

    Proactive pivoting is one of the hardest things, because it implies that we’re making a change before we absolutely have to make a change.

    We really don’t like change. We’re creatures of habit. We like our routines, and we like the familiar. When it comes to proactive pivoting, we need to conjure up a certain amount of strength, and faith that what we’re about to do will work out for us.

    Proactive pivoting is about getting ahead of change, seeing that change needs to come, and mustering the courage and the strength to make that change.

    We’re often more accustomed to crisis pivoting. This is when we have to pivot—when things happen legally, medically, relationally, or vocationally that require our immediate, all-hands-on-deck attention.

    Proactive pivoting is different. It is about getting ahead of change, seeing that change needs to come, and mustering the courage and the strength to make that change.

    Loss Aversion

    There are a few fears and obstacles that can get in the way when we’re thinking about pivoting. We all have our go-to place when it’s time for a change—the uncertainty, or the fear of failure, the unknown. Whatever those fears are, we all have them.

    The science of loss aversion shows that even if the change will bring us something equal to, or even a little better than what we currently have, we still resist.

    There’s also something that can get in our way called loss aversion. It turns out that even if the change will bring us something equal to, or even a little better than what we currently have, we still resist.

    The science indicates that in order to make a change, we need to perceive that what we’re going into is twice as positive as what we currently experience. Keeping in mind that experiencing this loss aversion can be very helpful to us in times of pivoting—just knowing that is a phenomenon, and being aware of it, can help us to face it.

    A Personal Example of Proactive Pivoting

    Here’s a personal example of a proactive pivot that occurred in my family.

    My mom was living in Janesville, Wisconsin, where she was born and where she had lived her entire life. She was 85, and she decided to move to Dallas, Texas.

    She was in perfectly fine health and has four children. I’m the oldest of four, and she decided to move before anything happened in her life that would force her to make a change. She was very familiar with her community—she knew her neighbor, she had grown up there, she was driving a car, and she had a very nice life there. But she was able to muster the strength to make a big change at her age. Now four years later, she’s still very healthy and is very grateful that years earlier had made that change.

    Deciding Not to Pivot is Okay, Too

    Sometimes change is genuinely not the right choice in a given moment, and that’s okay.

    We can become present with what our current situation is, assess it, and maybe determine that in the grander scheme of things, it’s not the time for us to pivot.

    In these moments, we don’t have to feel regret or guilt because we actually didn’t go through with it.

    The key is that we consider pivoting when things in our life indicate that would be best for our well-being, and if it’s not, then we can gently surrender.

    We are generally more skilled at crisis pivoting than proactive pivoting, so it isn’t always easy to know what the right thing to do is in the moment. Being compassionately present with ourselves in the process is key—including in the moments that we decide not to make a change, or in the moments when we decide to stay or move on, and we’re not sure.

    Mindfully Reflecting on Your Own Actions

    Think about a time in your life when you did proactively pivot.

    • What brought on the moment when you knew you had to consider change?
    • What did you do to prepare?
    • What helped you make your decision?
    • How did you feel about the change after you made it?
    • What were you most grateful for? What did you learn?

    Life is change, and change is constant. Mindfulness builds our courage, because it helps us pay more attention to our real lives as they’re happening—and that, in turn, helps us to discern when it’s time to change directions.



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  • A 12-Minute Meditation to Approach the World With a “Don’t-Know Mind”

    A 12-Minute Meditation to Approach the World With a “Don’t-Know Mind”

    We can find strength and resilience in familiarity—and use those feelings to explore the unfamiliar.

    At the beginning of every meditation practice that I teach, I offer up a little bit of instruction for the posture, so that you can experience this practice as being as supportive as possible to your body.

    A Meditation to Approach the World With a “Don’t-Know Mind” 

    1. I would like to invite you to come to a place that is truly comfortable and supportive to your practice. For some of you, this may mean a seated position on a chair, on a sofa, or even on some cushions on the floor. This might mean standing up, if that’s more supportive to your back and your posture. And for some of you, this may mean lying down on the ground. Please take a moment to come to whatever place is going to feel most compassionate to your body.
    2. Some of you may want to fully close your eyes for this meditation practice. And others may want to employ what I like to call a “soft gaze,” which is looking down at the ground about two inches in front of the knees or the feet.
    3. When you’ve settled into a comfortable position, I would love to invite you to take three deep breaths with me. As you’re taking those three deep breaths, you may notice that your body may begin to relax naturally. You may start to feel a little bit more deeply connected to whatever place makes contact with the earth. For some of you that’s going to be your feet, and for others that may be your back. Notice whatever place comes into contact with the earth in this moment.
    4. Begin to draw your attention and awareness to the connection between your body and the earth. It might feel beneficial at this point to take another deep inhale and exhale here. When you’re finished, return your breath back to a natural cadence and rhythm.
    5. You may notice the quality of the sound in the room that you’re in. Maybe there are some ambient noises that are coming from inside of wherever you are, whatever building you’re in. Or maybe there are sounds that are coming from outside. Please feel free to make these a part of your practice.
    6. Begin to draw your awareness to the bottoms of your feet, wherever they are landing on the earth. What do you notice? Does the right foot or the left foot feel slightly heavier than the other? As you notice the difference between the right and the left foot, perhaps you might also become aware of other micro-adjustments inside of your body.
    7. You may notice that the mind continues to produce thoughts, and that’s OK. The point of a meditation practice is not necessarily to stop thinking the thoughts that you are thinking, but rather to just be aware of the thoughts as they flow through the body and the mind. As you draw your awareness to your thoughts, you can also bring your awareness to the rhythm of your breath as it flows in and out of your body.
    8. I would like to invite you to bring your attention to the muscles of the belly and notice if they’ve been drawn in a little bit tightly towards the spine. Is it possible to invite a sense of relaxation, and even vulnerability, to the muscles of the belly by allowing them to be soft? Don’t worry, no one is watching. How does it feel when you invite a sense of softness and relaxation to the belly? How does the rest of the body respond?
    9. While your attention is here, you might begin to imagine a person, place, animal, or object that is deeply familiar to you. Perhaps this animal, person, place, or object reminds you of what it feels like to be home. Can you bring them into the room with you right now?
    10. Notice if that invitation has an impact on your breath, as it rises and falls from your chest. You might even feel a bit more safe in the space of this practice as you invite the image of what reminds you of being home, of being held.
    11. What is familiar to you, deeply familiar, about this person, animal, place, or object, that makes you feel as though you really know them? What is the feeling of knowing? What is the feeling of familiarity, and how does it land inside of the body? The invitation is to bring your attention back to the breath anytime that you notice yourself getting caught up in the story.
    12. Now, bring to mind an image of something that reminds you of what it means to be strong and resilient. Maybe there’s someone who you really look up to, or a place you’ve been that made you feel truly strong and resilient when you were there. Can you bring into your mind’s awareness the embodied sensations of being strong and resilient? Does your body make slight changes and shifts as you recall how this feels?
    13. Now we’re going to do a little bit of experimenting. Hopefully this will be fun. There’s a term called “don’t know mind” that is sometimes used in meditation to invoke a sense of curiosity.
    14. What is it like to approach the world with a “don’t know mind?” You may find that this is a bit of a contrast to the feeling of familiarity that we began to explore in the beginning of this practice. The feeling of familiarity is the feeling of, “Oh yes, I know. I know this person. I know this place. I know this animal or this object. They are deeply familiar to me.” Perhaps the way we view things, which are seemingly familiar to us, can begin to shift and change ever so slightly when we apply the pure curiosity of “don’t know mind.” How does that land in the body? This exploration of not knowing, of not being quite certain?
    15. At this point in your practice, you may notice if there are places in the body that begin to contract when we explore the feeling of “don’t know mind,” and that’s OK. This is the body’s intelligence. Can we unite this exploration of “don’t know mind” with those same sensations of strength and resilience, so that we know that no matter what, when we encounter moments of uncertainty and not-knowing that we have all the strength and resilience inside of our body to meet with that moment? What does it feel like to meet strength and resilience with not-knowing? Can we be truly curious about what arises in our awareness with this practice? Let’s take just a few moments in silence together now and explore the way that this feels.
    16. When you’re ready please bring your entire body into your mind’s eye and notice the difference between the way the body feels now and the way the body felt when you first entered into this space of practice. Take the time to notice the way the feet feel slightly different in the way they connect to the earth.
    17. Let’s all take one more deep breath in here.
    18. When you’re ready, at your own pace and rhythm, please begin to, ever so slowly and gently, open up the eyes, without staring at anything in particular. Allow color and texture to flood back into your mind’s awareness.
       
    19. From here we can begin the process of reorienting to the room that we’re in. Gently begin to turn and rotate the head and the neck, and take in the colors and textures of the space you are in. Notice if there’s anything new or different or alive in the space. What has changed since you started this practice?



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