Health Journal Online

Tag: self-acceptance

  • A 12-Minute Meditation to Embrace All Your Parts

    A 12-Minute Meditation to Embrace All Your Parts

    This week, Carley Hauck guides us to embrace all parts of ourselves—what isn’t serving us, as well as what we see as our positive attributes.

    Carley Hauck guides us to embrace all parts of ourselves—those qualities we see as our “shadow,” or what isn’t serving us, as well as the light, or what we see as our positive attributes. Especially as leaders (including any person who shows leadership in their life), working with both our “dark” and “light” parts allows us to shine our full potential out into the world.

    If you feel like it’s often too difficult or painful to acknowledge some aspects of who you are, this is a powerful practice for developing greater self-acceptance and self-love. As Carley reminds us, “The more you acknowledge the shadow, the more you will integrate and embrace it.” In this meditation, we’ll use a visualization technique, along with movement and sound, to support us in truly embracing every aspect of who we are.

    A Guided Meditation to Embrace All Your Parts

    1. Find a space where you can be quiet for several minutes. Take a few deep breaths in and out of your belly. Breathing in, allowing the belly to rise. Breathing out, allowing the belly to fall. 
    2. When you are relaxed, imagine yourself standing in the center of a circle of supportive people: Your family, friends, colleagues, pets, or guides. Close your eyes and soak up the feelings of love and acceptance. 
    3. Now acknowledge one or two parts of yourself that you struggle with or have disowned—perhaps your impatience, arrogance, shyness, fear of being unlovable. Anything you have a little shame around. These are the dark parts of you are the shadow. 
    4. Just a side note to say: we all have shadow aspects of our personalities. An easy way to identify your dark parts is to bring to mind a person in your life who triggers you. What do you not like about them? What do you struggle with when you’re with them? What is the trait or quality that is challenging about this person? For example, you might have a colleague who always turns in their reports late. And this elicits feelings of anger or discomfort. You feel the judgment about their lack of accountability. Now turn the mirror towards yourself and ask: In what ways am I like this? Or in the example above, you could ask, In what ways am I not accountable? When you see this behavior in yourself, you will likely feel discomfort in your body, or even a feeling of ouch. 
    5. I invite you to be with all that arises with a loving awareness. Wherever you look and whatever is brought into presence, shine love and awareness there. Take a few minutes to invite it in. And allow these dark parts, acknowledging them one by one, aloud or silently with love and presence. Try saying, I can be selfish, I can be arrogant, I can be impatient. The more you acknowledge the shadow, the more you will integrate and embrace it. 
    6. The truth is that leaders need all of our parts to shine our greatest light and potential in the world. Take another round of deep breaths in and deep breaths out. 
    7. Now let’s move to the light parts. These are the qualities you identify in yourself as positives or strengths. Say the list out loud or silently for a few minutes as mantras. For example: I am strong. I am smart. I am compassionate. I am resilient. Invite these parts into your awareness with love and presence. Allow all of these parts to be seen and embraced by your circle of supportive beings. 
    8. As you acknowledge each of these life parts, you can also invite in the dark. This is how we integrate and bring forward our whole self to work in the world. You can further support this integration by chanting one of these loving mantras: I embrace all of you. I love and accept all of you. I choose all of me. I am loving awareness. 
    9. As you repeat the mantra and notice how you feel in your mind, heart and body. Repeat your favorite mantras, especially when you aren’t being compassionate or kind to yourself, until you truly believe the message. Our thoughts become our beliefs. And they become patterns in our neural networks and our minds. 
    10. A profound way to bring your whole self to work and into daily life is to get into your body. For this exercise, you might choose to play with the movement piece and notice what kind of motion helps you embody the polarity of your dark and light parts. Try different stances, postures, gestures, or vocal sounds. The movements and sounds can then be integrated into your outer game of leadership by how you walk and talk and show up in the world. 
    11. Remember that developing any new pattern requires patience, practice, and persistence. But if you do this, you will be able to shine your greatest light. Thank you for your practice today.



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  • 5 Mindful Reasons to Lean In to Self-Love

    5 Mindful Reasons to Lean In to Self-Love

    This article is independently researched and written by the Mindful editors. However, we may earn revenue or commission if you purchase via links included.

    Even today, the idea of loving ourselves often gets a bad rap. Won’t that make me egotistical? we might think, or, Shouldn’t I spend my time and energy caring for others first? Or, we seek love and acceptance exclusively from other people, forgetting that we can always find them within ourselves.

    Both mindfulness teaching and scientific studies show that, far from leading to self-indulgence, a daily practice of self-compassion can have powerful benefits that extend beyond ourselves. As leading Mindful Self-Compassion researcher Kristin Neff writes, “We can learn to embrace ourselves and our lives, despite inner and outer imperfections, and provide ourselves with the strength needed to thrive.”

    Benefits of Self-Love

    With inspiration from our community of mindfulness teachers and experts, we’re sharing five reasons for everyone to cultivate self-love.

    1. Loving yourself supports improved mental health and well-being, as well as positive habit change. Many of us were brought up to think that being kind to ourselves is equivalent to being complacent or lacking the drive to “better” ourselves. Whole sections of the self-help industry have made millions off this assumption that we need “tough love” to force ourselves to change. Fortunately, current research shows that the reverse is true.

    As clinical psychologist and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy trainer Diana Hill shares, “Self-criticism lowers your self-confidence and increases anxiety and depression, undermining your ability to take steps toward change. In contrast, self-compassion motivates you to make healthier decisions and care for yourself.”

    2. Self-love is part of healing from hurt and trauma. Once thought to be a result of living through catastrophic events such as wars or natural disasters, trauma is now more broadly understood by researchers as “normal reactions to abnormal circumstances.” Whether or not a person experiences trauma after going through something difficult depends on a complex set of factors, including available coping mechanisms, access to the resources needed to bounce back, and community response.  

    While it is important that anyone seeking to heal from trauma be supported by a mental health professional, beginning to cultivate self-love is one powerful tool for a healing journey. When we offer ourselves care and compassion, this helps create a sense of inner safety and acceptance, instead of (in many cases) blaming ourselves for something that happened to us. Ali Smith, Atman Smith, and Andres Gonzalez, who work with youth in disadvantaged communities in West Baltimore, summarize this by saying: “Trauma closes all of our hearts. Self-love practices can open them.”

    3. Self-love creates more thoughtful, resilient leaders. All types of leaders risk burning out, whether they are responsible for a committee, a company, or a classroom. Leaders often care so much about the work itself—and about the people they are leading—that they neglect their own well-being. While genuine care for others is a leadership asset, it isn’t sustainable if we never take the time to fill our own cup. 

    CEO and leadership consultant Georgina Miranda suggests several ways that we can incorporate small habits of self-love and self-care into our leadership style: “When the world feels heavy and overwhelming, we can take a pause and ask ourselves: What would actually be helpful in this moment?”

    4. Self-compassion makes us braver, more mindful communicators. Most of us prefer to avoid what Mitch Abblett calls “the muck of difficult interactions—the blame, shame, resentment, and anxiety,” if we have the option. Even if we are willing to talk about the problem, humans are neurologically wired to slip into reactive habits such as blaming, bias, or defensiveness.

    When the time comes for a tough conversation, a foundation of self-love is our ally. Self-compassion practice allows us to stay grounded and present in the moment, so even if things start to get heated, we are able to engage with respect and consideration for all involved. Abblett says, “Bringing more flexible awareness to discomfort seems to open pathways to communication, even when it’s quite challenging.”

    5. Last but not least, loving yourself affirms that you are already enough. One reason we often seek love from others instead of ourselves is that we want someone else’s approval and acceptance–things we often don’t feel we can give to ourselves. We may spend years chasing accomplishments and accolades, and yet still feel unfulfilled. External “wins” are wonderful, but if we can’t accept ourselves as we are, it will never feel like enough. 

    Jenée Johnson offers this reminder that self-compassion empowers us to release perfectionism and realize that we are already worthy of acceptance and love: “You are a unique and perfect expression of life. No one before you and no one after you, is like you. Your journey is composed of experiences and the things you think, do, and pay attention to with consistency. You are enough.”

    Practice Self-Love With Mindful Affirmations

    Meet the Self-Love Affirmations Deck: A collaboration between Mindful and Mindfulness.com that reminds us all to fuel our heart and mind with the deepest kindness.

    Each of the 52 cards in this brand-new deck draws on the time-honored wisdom of mindfulness teachers and traditions, whispering notes of self-love, optimism, and inner courage and strength, so you can take on whatever comes your way.

    Guiding your journey on this path, each card is also embedded with a QR code. Simply scan it with your phone’s camera to access a special collection of 25 guided meditations from beloved teachers, curated specifically to enhance self-kindness and self-care.

    These cards are perfect for those of us who want:

    • Increased self-esteem: Choosing to love yourself, no matter what, can boost your self-worth and confidence, enabling you to approach life’s challenges with a positive and resilient mindset.
    • Reduced anxiety and improved mental well-being: Having a self-compassionate perspective helps in managing stress and anxiety, promoting a sense of inner peace and calm and nurturing emotional balance.
    • Self-care for all: Using Self-Love Affirmations makes it easy to bring mindfulness and self-compassion into your daily life, wherever you are on your journey.
    • Beautiful practice tools: The Self-Love Affirmations cards are created to last and, most importantly, to be enjoyed. Featuring a matte finish, silky smooth texture, and sturdy cardstock, you’ll want to bring them everywhere you go.
    • Versatility in our practice: Ideal for personal reflection or as a meaningful gift, the cards can be used in various settings, including personal meditation, family bonding time, or group activities in educational or professional environments.



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