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Tag: Ed Halliwell

  • When You’re Depressed: Is There Room to “Let Go”?

    When You’re Depressed: Is There Room to “Let Go”?

    Feeling overwhelmed is a common trigger for my anxiety attacks. A project doesn’t go as well as I’d hoped or I miss a deadline, and fear and insecurity rise in my mind and body. “I’m going to be judged and found wanting,” goes the narrative. “They won’t want to work with me again. Who was I anyway to take on such a job? I’m an imposter. I always fall at the last hurdle.” My heart starts racing, my stomach churns, my muscles stiffen. These sensations are unpleasant, so I tense up further in an unconscious attempt not to feel them, even while my attention is pulled in their direction. Oh no, says a new thought. Why am I getting so anxious and blocked.

    With so much energy expended internally, there’s less available to attend to daily matters. Panic may set in. “Now I can’t get any other work done,” my mind laments. “It’s the old cycle downwards again. I’m cursed with depression.” The familiar pressure builds up in my nose and chest, making it difficult to access any other feelings, and the negativity starts to spiral: I won’t be able to cope, I’ll be left with no money, no energy, unable to dig myself out of this hole. The doom-mongering thoughts fuel even more anxiety. It could go on indefinitely—a self-fulfilling prophecy.

    With so much energy expended internally, there’s less available to attend to daily matters.

    But hang on a minute. If these thoughts are just thoughts—and probably mere projections, tainted by the negative bias that comes especially at times of stress—then there’s no need to follow them. Anxiety is a feeling, and I know that feelings come and go. Yesterday’s thoughts and feelings were different, so who’s to say my internal weather isn’t due another change? There are patterns of experience, for sure, but this moment is just a vibration of energy experienced in consciousness, created by constellations of events in the mind, body, and outside world around a so-called “me” that in reality has no fixed location. Ideas in the mind are in flux, sensations in the body are in flux, and the trigger events are already receding into memory—no more than traces of causal energy that set the winds of mental and physical habit blowing. Suddenly, with this shift in perspective, thoughts, and feelings are no longer facts, and there’s not even a solid, single, separate “me” to feel upset or hurt by them. There is just experience, happening on and on. It’s painful experience right now, to be sure, but just energy in motion nevertheless. I’m changing from moment to moment, too—everything is in flow, as it always is. This won’t stay the same, and nor will I.

    “No Feeling is Final.”

    Rainer Maria Rilke once said: “Let everything happen to you: beauty and terror. Just keep going. No feeling is final.” We can make it even less personal. Just let everything happen (drop the “to you”)—watch and feel each aspect of the mind–body–world show play out on the stage of consciousness, experiencing it all with interest and kindness in the knowledge that the moment is already and inevitably on its way to becoming something else. If the energy is allowed to play out by itself, the next moments are less likely to be conditioned by misguided attempts to turn what is flowing into something solid, or to push away what is here so it’s no longer part of the moment. Neither solidifying nor separating from the moment can ever be successful, because the moment is always both here and in transition. But if there is no depression to get stuck in, and no self to get hurt, then everything in mind, body, and life can flow like an undammed river, with energy streaming through without the defensive psychic barriers that serve only to turn that energy in on itself.

    By shifting perspective and approach—experiencing without grasping and resistance—this moment has already become different from how it might have been.

    Negative thoughts—as well as the bodily symptoms of fear—may still be present. But they are not “mine” any more. They just are—present remnants of past events that do not need to be turned into unnecessary future suffering. By shifting perspective and approach—experiencing without grasping and resistance—this moment has already become different from how it might have been.

    A Mountain Meditation to Help You Shift Out of Panic Mode

    This mindfulness practice, often referred to as “the mountain meditation,” can help us center in our bodies especially in the midst of life’s shifting swirls. By imagining and then embodying the steadiness of a mountain, we’re training in being present to the weather of the world, as well as to our own internal weather: our thoughts and sensations.

    1) Settle into an upright, comfortable sitting posture. Present and awake. Gentle and steady. Connected to the ground below. Body rising up into the air.

    2) Imagine in your mind’s eye a beautiful mountain. It could be a mountain you’ve climbed or viewed from a distance, or perhaps one you’ve seen in a film or picture. Or maybe one you’ve just conjured up in your mind. Either way, visualize a mountain that for your embodies majesty and magnificence, full of natural wonder.

    3) Notice the awesome qualities of the mountain: See in your mind how its foot is grounded firmly in the earth and how it rises up into the air unapologetically and fully taking its place in the landscape. Bring awareness to its solidity, its stillness, its strength, and its size. Come day or night, storm and sun, winter and summer, the mountain abides in the space, sitting still in its landscape, unwavering whatever the weather. It doesn’t have to do anything. It just is. A beautiful mountain. Amazing just by its very existence. And whether it’s sunny, snowing, blowing a gale, hot, warm, cool, or cold, the mountain just is there, sitting present.

    4) Notice your own mountainous qualities as you sit here. Just like the mountain is plugged into the earth, so your feet are connected to the ground. Your body rising upwards like the body of the mountain. Your head rests on your shoulders like the peak of the mountain and you can be here, fully present like the mountain sits in its space. Your body and being as miraculous as the mountain that evokes such wonder just by its presence. Like the mountain, being an embodiment of stillness, solidity, beauty, without having to do anything else.

    There may be weather going on of course: events in life, thoughts, and sensations ebbing and flowing in the internal and external environment. Whatever the weather, just for now, practice being a “breathing body mountain.” Naturally wonderful, whether the weather seems pleasant or unpleasant. Let the climates of the world happen: being rained on, shined on, snowed on—stay present as best you can to whatever comes.

    5) When the mind wanders, invite attention back to the sense of being a mountain or if you prefer, let your attention rest on the mountain in your mind for a while before returning to sensations in the body. Let go of the need to feel a particular way. If you don’t feel mountainous, that’s fine.

    This practice invites you to cultivate a quality rather than fabricate a feeling: just being a “breathing body mountain.”

    This post was adapted from Into The Heart of Mindfulness, by Ed Halliwell, published by Piatkus). Download a set of 14 guided audio meditation practices from Ed’s books here.



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  • The One Thing You Can Do to Make Meditation a Habit

    The One Thing You Can Do to Make Meditation a Habit

    The march of mindfulness into the mainstream seems to show no sign of slowing. On balance that’s a good thing. However, I’m struck more and more how an aspect of the approach—long-considered to be crucial in order to make meditation a habit—doesn’t get mentioned very much these days.

    An individualistic culture often portrays mindfulness as a solo practice. Maybe that’s no surprise. We imagine a person sitting alone, cultivating attitudes such as curiosity and gentleness. I’ve no doubt that practising mindfulness on your own can be helpful. But traditionally, learners trained in groups and communities. I suspect a large part of the therapeutic benefit of mindfulness for individuals comes from this tradition. Why? Because approaching practice this way enables us to learn with and from other people.

    Why Community Can Make Meditation a Habit That Lasts

    When people come together for a first session of mindfulness training, it’s common to explore what brings each individual to the approach.

    In an opening session, you’ll likely hear others speak of the stress arising from common problems such as:

    • busy, uncontrolled thoughts
    • physical or emotional pain
    • the strain of personal and professional commitments
    • the speed of a world that demands a dehumanizing degree of consumption and acquisition

    There often dawns a first recognition that the real problem doesn’t just lie in me as an individual. Instead, people see the common burden of living a human existence, with human frailties, in a human world.

    Suddenly, often from a place of feeling alienated and alone, there comes a realization: We’re all in this together, and we’re not feeling bad because we’re defective, but because this is the way of things in the world we share.

    Suddenly, often from a place of feeling alienated and alone, there comes a realization. We’re all in this together. And we’re not feeling bad because we’re defective, but because this is the way of things in the world we share. It’s not all our own fault. This lessens and lightens the pressure to have it all together. The journey into mindfulness—together—has begun.

    Over time, as a group of people cultivates mindfulness in this way, the feeling of connectedness and commonality usually grows. There is a sense of mutual support that enables us to learn, love, laugh at ourselves, and let go together.

    It may well be that this way of being together as a group is just as, or perhaps even more important, than the formal meditation practices we undertake as part of the work.

    Especially when facilitated by a good teacher, people discover it’s easier to open up to ourselves and one another. Also, as it happens, I’ve found that meditating in a group on a regular basis is also one of the best ways to encourage people to practise on their own. It’s counterintuitive, perhaps, but that togetherness makes meditation more meaningful. That, in turn, makes meditating alone more manageable. The togetherness helps make meditation a habit, whether done solo or in community.

    More Research Is Needed

    In my opinion, this hypothesis—that mindfulness as a group activity is much more powerful than practising on your own, with a book, with an app or a CD (good though these may be)—hasn’t been explored enough in mindfulness research.

    We don’t really know what the specific benefits of learning mindfulness together are. However, related research which shows that people’s attitudes and behaviours are strongly primed by the environments in which they operate offers some clues.

    It seems logical that a meditative community will be a more inspiring and influential learning zone for mindfulness than a place where speed, greed, and “going it alone” are the norm. But this isn’t what’s being offered to most people, at least not beyond the first eight weeks of a mindfulness-based stress reduction or cognitive therapy course. There are still few fully secular options for ongoing training available to graduates of such courses, and no retreat centers (so far as I know) completely devoted to a non-doctrinal mindfulness approach.

    If we want the current surging interest in mindfulness to become more than a drop of sanity in an ocean of materialistic madness, we will need to create communities capable of curating the core attitudes and approaches whose preservation protects the practices from perversion, dissolution, and misappropriation. We want to make meditation a habit for more people…and we want to do it in a healthy, supported way.

    This is not an easy task, and it won’t happen perfectly. We live in a messy world, with messy minds. Taking a preaching, purist line is likely to be counter-productive.

    Mindfulness is entering a mainstream in which feeling like we have to go it alone is part of the problem, not the solution. 

    I reckon we have a better chance if we name the issue. Mindfulness is entering a mainstream in which feeling like we have to go it alone is part of the problem, not the solution. Yes, the pressure for a primarily do-it-yourself, self-help approach to mindfulness is strong. But down that road, we might actually end up with something that’s a pale imitation of the powerful force for good that mindfulness can be.

    If we compassionately acknowledge the social and environmental obstacles we are all collectively responsible for, and lean on each other for support, we can make a lasting, positive impact.



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